It’s not uncommon to feel attracted to your doctor. After all, they likely possess many qualities that are appealing in a partner – they’re intelligent, caring, good listeners and often attractive. However, dating your doctor raises a number of ethical concerns and legal issues that need to be considered. In most cases, it’s best to avoid pursuing a romantic relationship with your physician.
Is it Ethical for a Doctor to Date a Patient?
Most medical professionals and healthcare organizations consider it unethical for physicians to date patients. The American Medical Association’s Code of Medical Ethics clearly states that romantic relationships between patients and physicians are unethical. There are several good reasons behind this ethical stance:
- Dating patients is a violation of the physician’s role as a fiduciary or trusted caregiver. Doctors have professional obligations to act in the best interest of their patients and avoid any conflicts of interest.
- A dating relationship may impair the physician’s objectivity and affect their medical judgment when treating the patient.
- The difference in power and status between doctors and patients makes any romantic relationship inherently unequal and ripe for exploitation.
- Patients are vulnerable – physically, emotionally and financially – when seeking medical care. This vulnerability could be exploited by an unethical physician.
For these reasons, every major medical organization considers it unethical for doctors to date patients, even if the patient initiates it or consents. Most policies forbid doctor-patient dating until after the professional relationship has ended.
Is Doctor-Patient Dating Illegal?
In most states, it is not strictly illegal for doctors to date patients. However, it may constitute legal grounds for medical malpractice or disciplinary action against the doctor’s medical license. Some potential legal issues include:
- Medical malpractice – If the doctor’s medical judgment appears to be affected by the relationship, the patient may sue for malpractice if they are harmed. Even if no harm occurs, dating a current patient is widely seen as malpractice.
- Sexual exploitation – Many states consider doctor-patient relationships inherently exploitative. Dating a current patient could lead to criminal charges or civil lawsuits for sexual exploitation.
- Disciplinary action – State medical boards can sanction doctors for unprofessional conduct like dating patients. Possible penalties include license suspension, restrictions or revocation.
To avoid legal trouble, doctors should avoid dating patients until the professional relationship is completely over. They should also avoid providing medical care to anyone they’re dating.
When Can a Doctor Legally Date an Ex-Patient?
Most policies do not explicitly forbid doctors from dating former patients. However, they typically recommend waiting a reasonable time after the professional relationship has ended before dating an ex-patient. Recommended time periods range from 3-12 months or more.
The goal is to allow enough time to pass that:
- The doctor is no longer in a position of influence over the patient.
- The patient’s vulnerability from the prior relationship has resolved.
- A reasonable person would not view the doctor as exploiting the prior professional relationship.
Doctors should also avoid treating any ex-patients they eventually date in the future. The prior relationship means the doctor can no longer be objective when providing medical care.
Can You Date Your Psychiatrist?
Dating your psychiatrist is almost always prohibited. The American Psychiatric Association’s ethics code forbids psychiatrists from ever dating current or former patients.
There are a few reasons psychiatrists are held to an even higher ethical standard than other doctors:
- Psychiatrists have intimate knowledge of their patients’ inner thoughts, emotions and vulnerabilities. This creates a huge imbalance of power in the relationship.
- Patients disclose highly sensitive mental health information to psychiatrists that could be exploited in a romantic relationship.
- Psychiatric treatment often involves discussion of intimate topics like sexuality. This creates ambiguity that is ripe for exploitation by an unethical psychiatrist.
For these reasons, any romantic relationship between a psychiatrist and patient – whether current or former – is considered unethical and should be avoided.
Can You Date Your Therapist?
Most mental health professionals associations have ethics codes that prohibit therapists from dating current or former patients, similar to psychiatrists.
Some reasons dating your therapist is unethical include:
- The therapist is privy to highly sensitive information and emotional vulnerabilities that could be exploited.
- There is an extreme imbalance of power given the therapist’s position of authority and influence.
- Transference – developing romantic feelings for one’s therapist – is common and should be explored therapeutically, not acted upon.
Dating one’s therapist is never appropriate. If romantic feelings do develop, the appropriate course of action is to discuss it candidly with the therapist and likely end the therapeutic relationship.
When is it Okay for a Doctor to Date a Patient?
There are very limited situations where dating a current or former patient may be ethically permissible:
- The doctor and patient had a pre-existing relationship before the professional one, such as being partners or spouses.
- The prior professional contact was minor – e.g. the patient was seen just once several years ago for a minor concern.
- The patient initiated contact long after the professional relationship ended and a reasonable person would not view it as exploitative.
However, doctors should be very cautious about dating any current or former patient. It’s best to avoid these situations if possible or obtain an ethics consultation first.
Tips for Doctors on Managing Attraction to Patients
It’s not uncommon for well-meaning doctors to develop an attraction to a patient. Here are some tips for managing it ethically:
- Be aware of and reflect on your feelings to ensure they don’t affect your medical judgment.
- Maintain professional boundaries and avoid disclosing personal details or contact outside medical visits.
- Do not act on the attraction or engage in flirting or suggestive comments.
- Transfer the patient’s care to another doctor if the attraction impairs your objectivity.
- Seek consultation from an ethics committee or supervisor if needed.
- Wait the recommended time period after ending the professional relationship before pursuing a romantic relationship.
With caution and adherence to ethical principles, doctors can manage occasional attraction to patients and avoid exploiting these relationships.
Can You Date a Nurse or Someone Else on Your Medical Team?
Many healthcare facilities prohibit or strongly discourage doctors from dating coworkers who are involved in patient care, such as nurses.
Potential issues with dating healthcare colleagues include:
- It can create awkwardness or tension affecting the work environment and patient care.
- One person may feel pressured or coerced into an unwanted relationship.
- It may appear unprofessional to patients.
- If a breakup occurs, it can compromise working relationships and disrupt team functioning.
However, doctors dating non-patient care staff, such as administrative personnel, is less problematic as it poses fewer risks to patients. Still, workplace romances can be tricky and doctors should proceed cautiously.
Conclusion
Dating patients is considered unethical and illegal in most cases due to the imbalance of power, potential for exploitation and effect on medical judgment. Doctors may date former patients but only after enough time has passed since the end of the professional relationship. Psychiatrists and therapists should never date current or former patients. Managing attraction to patients ethically is crucial to avoid disciplinary action or lawsuits. Healthcare professionals who wish to date are safest looking outside their immediate team and work environment. While challenging, doctors can certainly have healthy romantic relationships by proceeding ethically and with caution when it comes to dating patients or coworkers.