What is Asperger’s Syndrome?
Asperger’s Syndrome is a developmental disorder that is part of the autism spectrum. It is characterized by difficulties in social interaction, communication, and restrictive/repetitive behaviors and interests. Unlike classic autism, those with Asperger’s typically have average or above average intelligence and normal language development. Asperger’s is generally considered a high functioning form of autism.
Some common symptoms and characteristics of Asperger’s Syndrome include:
- Difficulty with social interactions like making eye contact, reading facial expressions and body language, making small talk, understanding humor, and picking up on social cues.
- Narrow, intense interests or hobbies. People with Asperger’s often have very specific interests they are extremely knowledgeable about.
- Inflexible adherence to routines and difficulty with change.
- Clumsiness and uncoordinated motor movements.
- Sensitivity to certain textures, sounds, or other sensory stimuli.
- Very literal thinking, difficulty understanding figurative language, sarcasm, and metaphor.
- Speaking in a monotone voice or exaggerated vocal inflections.
Though the exact causes are unknown, Asperger’s appears to have a genetic component and differences in brain development and structure. It affects people of all races, ethnicities, and socioeconomic backgrounds. The condition occurs in around 1 in 160 people and is more common in males.
Living Independently
Many people with Asperger’s are fully capable of living independently, holding jobs, maintaining relationships, and contributing positively to society. With the right supports and coping strategies, individuals with Asperger’s can live very successful and fulfilling lives. Here are some tips for living independently with Asperger’s Syndrome:
Develop Daily Living Skills
Mastering basic household tasks like cooking, cleaning, laundry, and home maintenance allows for greater independence. Create checklists, schedules, and routines around these daily living skills. Start early and practice to build competency over time. Consider occupational therapy to work on areas of difficulty.
Manage Finances Responsibly
Learn money management skills like budgeting, bill paying, and long term financial planning. Be organized and systematic with finances. Seek support from family, social workers, or financial advisors if needed. Consider setting up automatic payments or direct deposit when possible.
Utilize Tools and Technology
Smartphones, tablets, computers and tools like calendar alerts, timers, calculators, navigation apps, and digital organizers can provide valuable structure, reminders, and assistance for someone with Asperger’s. Leverage these technologies to help with time management, organization, social skills, and daily tasks.
Develop Transportation Independence
Having the ability to drive or use public transportation greatly improves access to jobs, social events, shopping, and healthcare. Work on getting a driver’s license and practice navigating public transit. Role play bus routes, plan trips ahead of time, or use transit apps to build confidence.
Find the Right Living Situation
Some individuals with Asperger’s choose to live alone while others opt for assisted or group home living arrangements. Consider your needs for support, desired level of independence, and any sensory or social challenges when choosing housing. Seek guidance from therapists or social workers.
Build a Circle of Support
Connecting with understanding friends, family members, counselors, community groups, vocational organizations, and health professionals provides an invaluable network of support. Have go-to people to call on during difficult times. Support groups can also connect you with others facing similar challenges.
Maintaining Employment
Many individuals with Asperger’s hold successful, meaningful careers in a wide variety of fields. With the right job fit, workplace accommodations, and coping methods, maintaining employment is certainly achievable. Strategies that can help include:
Choose an ASD-Friendly Career Path
Select a career that utilizes the strengths commonly associated with Asperger’s such as attention to detail, technical skills, deep focus, and expertise with specialized interests. Jobs like accounting, engineering, graphic design, computer programming, library science, or mechanics are great options to consider.
Be Upfront with Employers
Disclosing your Asperger’s diagnosis and discussing potential workplace needs can help put appropriate accommodations in place. But know your rights – employers cannot discriminate against you due to a disability. Disclosure is your choice.
Request Accommodations
Reasonable accommodations could include a quiet workspace, noise-cancelling headphones, flexible hours, written job instructions, adjusted lighting or work duties, predictable routines, and additional training or support. Know what adaptations would help you succeed.
Manage Sensory Needs
Overwhelming sensory stimuli like bright lights, loud noise, crowded spaces and constant interruption can quickly lead to sensory overload. Have strategies in place like taking breaks, dimming lights, wearing headphones, or having a private workspace to regulate sensations.
Improve Social Interaction Skills
On-the-job social functioning may require extra effort. Practice workplace small talk, read books on business etiquette, join a public speaking group, and observe how coworkers interact. Consider disclosure to colleagues to foster understanding.
Leverage Strengths & Passions
The intense interests and focus associated with Asperger’s can be a professional asset. Find ways to apply your strengths and passions within your job duties. Become the office expert people depend on for your specialized skillset.
Utilize Job Coaches
A job coach provides personalized support and advocacy in finding and sustaining employment. They can help with interview prep, disclosure strategies, requesting accommodations, social skills, and managing anxiety or conflicts on the job.
Building Friendships and Relationships
Developing meaningful friendships and relationships enrich life for everyone, including those with Asperger’s. Adjusting communication styles and understanding social dynamics are key to connecting with others. Useful tips include:
Find People with Shared Interests
Nothing builds friendship faster than common interests and passions. Join clubs, volunteer groups, sports teams, or specialized Meetups where you can bond over shared hobbies, causes, and activities you enjoy.
Develop Conversation Skills
Practice active listening, asking questions, not interrupting, understanding humor, and reading body language and facial expressions. Learn tips for starting, joining, and exiting conversations gracefully. Chat about neutral topics.
Be a Good Friend
Show you care by remembering important details about people, making time for friends, doing nice things for them, apologizing after disagreements, and supporting them through difficult times. Follow the golden rule.
Start Dating
Put yourself out there! Dating sites, singles groups, and social events are great ways to meet potential romantic partners. Be upfront about having Asperger’s when you feel comfortable. Look for patient, compassionate people who appreciate you.
Join an ASD Social Group
Find local autism groups that host get-togethers, game nights, dances, potlucks, and outings. Connecting with others on the spectrum provides built-in understanding and support. Practice social skills in a safe environment.
Communicate Openly
Politely explain social difficulties and sensory needs to friends and partners. Most will be willing to adapt to your style of communication and interaction once they understand. Simple adjustments can make all the difference.
Don’t Lose Hope
Making and keeping friends may feel frustrating at times, but don’t give up. The rewards of meaningful connection are worth the effort. Social skills can be learned and improved with time, patience, and practice.
Coping with Challenges
Living with Asperger’s certainly comes with challenges in navigation the social world, swirling sensory stimuli, adjusting to change, and managing anxiety. Having healthy coping strategies makes all the difference. Ways to cope include:
See a Therapist
Find a counselor or therapist who has experience with autism spectrum disorders to help develop coping methods tailored to your needs. Cognitive behavioral therapy in particular can teach valuable stress and emotion management techniques.
Practice Relaxation Techniques
Try yoga, deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, meditation, visualization, listening to calming music or other methods to activate your relaxation response and alleviate anxiety. Find what works best for you.
Get Physical Exercise
Exercise is a proven stress reducer. Even light physical activity like walking helps relieve tension, improves sleep, and elevates mood. Join an ASD-friendly exercise class or simply take walks around your neighborhood.
Stim as Needed
“Stimming” refers to self-stimulatory behaviors that provide soothing sensory input. Fidgeting, rocking, chewing gum, listening to music, carrying fidget toys and more can help calm the mind. Stim in acceptable ways as needed.
Ask for Help
Speaking up when you feel overwhelmed can keep small problems from spiraling into big ones. Let loved ones know what you need, whether it’s an encouraging word, help with a task, or just a listening ear.
Have a Safety Net
Establish a good support system for times of crisis like meltdowns or burnout. Keep trusted loved ones on speed dial who you can call day or night for help, advice, or just moral support when you need it.
Limit Stressful Situations
Pay attention to your unique stress triggers and limits. Avoid overwhelming social gatherings, noisy places, sensory overload, and situations requiring rapid shift or adaptation. Learn to say no.
Beware of Depression
People on the autism spectrum are vulnerable to co-occurring conditions like anxiety and depression. Seek help immediately if you notice symptoms like prolonged sadness, loss of interest in activities, changes in sleep or appetite, or suicidal thoughts.
Find Acceptance
Focus on valuing your unique gifts, not comparing yourself to others. Surround yourself with supportive people who appreciate you for you. Self-acceptance is so important in coping and moving confidently through life.
Know Your Limits
Don’t overload your schedule to the point of burnout. Leave room for downtime and sensory-friendly activities. Pay attention to your stress levels and give yourself permission to say no or take a break when needed. Listen to your mind and body.
Keep a Schedule
Structured days with regular routines build predictability and stability. Use schedules, planners, and calendar alerts to keep organized and know what to expect. Having a regular daily rhythm can be very soothing.
Developing Life Skills
Certain life skills like communication, organization, self-care, household tasks, and decision making may require extra effort and practice for those with Asperger’s. Making progress in these crucial areas vastly improves quality of life. Helpful strategies include:
Improve Communication Abilities
Take conversation or public speaking classes to hone social communication. Let others gently know when you misunderstand. Verbalize your feelings and needs clearly. Practice reading facial expressions and body language through online games or flashcards.
Get Organized
Use daily planners, calendars, task lists, reminders and file systems to stay on top of schedules and obligations. Set up bill pay, file taxes, and run errands on time. Make and keep appointments with support. Establish consistent daily routines.
Learn Self-Care Skills
Master personal hygiene, healthy eating, identifying illness, proper sleep habits, home safety, and seeking medical care when needed. Seek support with tasks like cooking, laundry, or cleaning if deficits cause daily living challenges.
Improve Decision Making
When facing difficult choices, outline pros and cons, seek trusted input, research options, and evaluate possible consequences before deciding. Weigh risks and results. Start slowly with smaller decisions to build confidence.
Know Your Learning Style
What helps you study and retain new information best? Auditory, visual, hands-on learning? Mix up study techniques and use methods tailored for your unique learning style to maximize comprehension and recall.
Ask for Help When Needed
No one masters life skills overnight. Seek support from loved ones, therapists, coaches, and support groups in the areas where you struggle most. There is no shame in needing assistance while you learn and grow.
Explore Assistive Technology
Tools like digital planners and reminders, speech to text programs, social narratives, emotion recognition software and more can provide guidance with communication, organization, social skills, daily tasks, and sensory regulation. Find the right tech aids for you.
Join a Support Group
Connecting with other adults on the spectrum provides community, understanding, and a safe space to practice social skills. Groups also share life tips, coping strategies, resources, and experiences. We all go farther together.
Finding Happiness and Purpose
Like anyone else, people with Asperger’s long for purposeful and fulfilling lives. Discovering personal passions and joyful hobbies, contributing your talents to the world, and finding accepting communities can all nurture happiness on the spectrum. Additional tips include:
Pursue Your Interests
Make time for the hobbies, collections, and intellectual interests that absorb your focus and make you lose track of time. Specialized passions give life meaning and provide soothing sensory experiences. Indulge them often.
Contribute Your Talents
Everyone has unique skills and gifts to offer. Share yours through volunteering, creative outlets, civic participation, social groups or causes important to you. Using your abilities to contribute boosts self-worth.
Focus on The Positive
Practice gratitude, optimism and positive thinking. Keep a journal of happy moments large and small. Spend time in nature and find beauty around you. Laugh and seek out joy. Surround yourself with positive people.
Try Varied Activities
Step outside your comfort zone to discover new interests that energize you. Take cooking, art, dance, or music classes. Learn a new skill. Go on outings with supportive friends. Say yes to invitations that interest you.
Set Meaningful Goals
Choose goals that reflect your values and give you a sense of purpose like volunteering, advancing your career, improving health, developing talents, or broadening your social circle. Take incremental steps to achieve them.
Find Accepting Communities
Seek out faith, social, recreational, or intellectual groups that appreciate diversity and neurodiversity. Building community with open-minded people provides connection and empowerment.
Practice Self-Care
Make your health and wellbeing a priority with regular exercise, nutritious meals, stress management, enjoyable leisure time, and restful sleep. Take time to relax and recharge. You cannot pour from an empty cup.
Know Your Worth
Be kind and patient with yourself, celebrate growth and wins of any size, and value your unique talents. Challenge negative self-talk and comparison. You are enough just as you are. You have much to offer the world.
Conclusion
Although living with Asperger’s certainly comes with challenges in navigating the neurotypical world, many individuals with Asperger’s live happy, independent, and fulfilling lives with the right supports and strategies in place. Focus on developing your strengths, embracing your neurodiversity, practicing self-care, asking for support when needed, and pursuing purposeful activities and communities. With care, patience, and compassion for yourself, you can find joy and thrive as your unique self. The future is bright for those on the spectrum who leverage their gifts to live life on their own terms.