The Elf on the Shelf has become a popular Christmas tradition in many households. The premise is that the elf is sent by Santa Claus to watch over children in the weeks leading up to Christmas. The elf perches in a different location each morning to keep an eye on things. Children are told that they must not touch or play with the elf, or else it will lose its magic. This raises the question – can you really not touch Elf on the Shelf? Let’s take a closer look at the rules around handling this holiday helper.
What is Elf on the Shelf?
Elf on the Shelf is a toy designed to be a fun Christmas tradition for families with young children. The kit comes with a small elf doll and a children’s book that explains the concept. The idea is that each night the elf flies back to the North Pole to report to Santa if the children in the home have been naughty or nice. Before the family wakes up each morning, the elf flies back from the North Pole and lands in a new spot in the house to watch over the children as they go about their day. The elf is not meant to be touched or held by the children, as direct contact is said to drain his magic.
What are the official rules about touching Elf on the Shelf?
According to The Elf on the Shelf website, which provides the official rules, children are not supposed to touch the elf at all. It is emphasized that direct contact will make the elf lose his magic. The rules state:
“There is only one rule that you have to follow, so I will come back and be alive. Please do not touch me. My magic might go, and Santa won’t hear all I’ve seen or I know.”
So in short, the official rule is that any intentional physical contact by the children will render the elf powerless. The magic is activated by the act of not touching it.
What happens if you touch Elf on the Shelf?
Given the strict official rule, many parents reinforce to their children that under no circumstances should they touch the elf. But accidents happen, especially with curious young kids eager to explore. So what really happens if the elf gets touched or held? Here are some potential consequences:
The elf loses his magic
According to the backstory, direct contact drains the elf’s magic that allows him to fly to the North Pole and report back to Santa. So if kids touch the elf, he is unable to complete his nightly journey and carry out his intelligence duties. After being touched, the elf is rendered motionless and speechless.
The elf doesn’t move for the rest of the season
The elf freezing in place after being touched helps reinforce the message to kids that they broke the rules. Some parents use this as a way to teach a gentle lesson about following instructions. Once touched, the elf often remains in the same spot without moving for the remainder of the holidays as a consequence.
The elf goes in “quarantine”
Some parents place the elf in quarantine to emphasize that he has lost his magic. They may put him inside a glass jar or box for 24 hours to reinforce that he is powerless and unable to fly or report to Santa after being handled. This visually communicates the impact of the broken rule.
The elf returns to the North Pole early
Having the elf disappear back to the North Pole prematurely is another potential result of physical contact. Without his magic activated by the hands-off rule, he has no reason to stick around watching the kids. The elf’s early departure underscores the message that touching has consequences.
The elf gets a talking to
Parents may also have the elf write notes explaining he has lost his magic and will be taking time off from his spying duties. The notes serve to let children know that their behavior directly impacted the elf’s role and that actions (or touching) have repercussions. It’s a reminder to follow the rules.
Nothing happens
Realistically, some parents don’t do anything to the elf when it gets touched. They may gently remind kids not to handle the elf but don’t bother reinforcing the magic storyline. After all, it’s just a doll and they don’t want children to get too upset over accidentally touching it now and then. The elf simply resumes his usual routine.
Should you confess if you touch Elf on the Shelf?
If a family firmly communicates that touching the elf makes his magic disappear, children may feel pressure to hide any accidental contact. But should kids confess if they give in to temptation and touch the forbidden toy? Here are some perspectives:
Yes, confess
Being honest helps reinforce the rules and teaches integrity. It also gives parents an opportunity to have a dialogue about why it’s important to follow instructions. Without confession, the child misses a chance to learn from their mistake.
No need to confess minor touches
A graze of contact here and there realistically will go unnoticed and doesn’t require confession. Admitting to more significant handling would be more appropriate, as greater consequences warrant discussion. Use discretion based on the degree of rule breaking.
Redirect behavior instead of confessing
Rather than focusing solely on confessing and consequences, parents can redirect behavior when rules are broken. Remind children why touching isn’t allowed but emphasize that they can do better next time. Move forward in a positive way.
Confess if the elf is damaged
If an accident leads to harm to the elf, such as a broken limb, then confession is considerate so parents know repairs are needed. But if it’s a minor touch with no damage, it’s not crucial to admit it. Evaluate the outcome in deciding whether to come clean.
What if other people touch Elf on the Shelf?
Beyond the kids in the household, other people visiting or living there may unintentionally touch the elf on the shelf. Parents need to have a game plan if this happens. Here are some scenarios:
Younger siblings touch the elf
If a younger child in the home touches the elf, parents can use it as a teaching moment for both kids. Explain that the older ones did a nice job following the rules and now it’s time to help the younger sibling learn them too. Take a nurturing approach.
Older siblings touch the elf to blame younger ones
Parents need to have a talk if they discover an older child deliberately touched the elf in order to frame a younger sibling. Explain that tricks like this undermine the trust required for the elf tradition to work and that everyone needs to cooperate.
Visiting friends and relatives touch the elf
Politely remind visiting loved ones about the “hands-off” rule so they don’t absentmindedly fiddle with the elf. But if it happens, take it as an honest mistake rather than an intentional undermining of your family’s tradition. Gently reinforce the boundaries.
The dog or cat touches the elf
If the family pet knocks down the elf, use it as an opportunity to teach kids that sometimes accidents happen. Help them understand that the pets didn’t knowingly break the rules. Work together to find a safer spot for the elf out of a curious pet’s reach.
Parents touch the elf to move it at night
Obviously parental handling is inevitable as parents carefully reposition the elf each evening. Make clear that while kids can’t touch the elf, mom and dad need to in order to do their important part of the tradition. Explain that adult handling doesn’t drain elf magic.
Can Elf on the Shelf be washed?
Along with physical contact, parents may wonder if getting the elf dirty or exposing him to water from washing will impact his magic. Here’s some guidance:
Washing violates the rules
The official rules state that water can compromise the elf’s magic. Getting the elf soaked or submerged during bathing rituals is discouraged and seen as roughly equivalent to touching in draining his power. Soap and water break the spell.
Spot clean gentle spills
However, carefully dabbing a small spill or soiled area with a damp cloth may not carry such consequences. As long as the elf’s clothes stay dry and it doesn’t get soaked, quick moisture shouldn’t do harm. Just air dry immediately after.
Surface stains are okay
If the elf ends up in a spot that leaves dust or cookie crumbs on his clothing, there’s no need for urgent washing. Those types of natural surface stains can be left as-is until the end of the season when it’s time to carefully clean and pack up the elf.
Check the tag
For guidance tailored specifically to your elf, check the tag on its clothing. Many newer models indicate “surface wash only” meaning gentle wiping down is tolerated. But full submersion or machine washing is still considered risky to the magic.
Spraycleaner is ideal
For parents who feel cleaning is absolutely necessary before moving an noticeably soiled elf, a spray fabric cleaner is a good compromise. Very light misting neutralizes odors and lifts some dirt without directly soaking the elf or his clothing. Air dry thoroughly after.
Conclusion
While Elf on the Shelf’s magic is not technically real, preserving the illusion that touching him has consequences is central to making the tradition work. Allowing handling would take away the sense of anticipation kids get from finding the elf in new spots each morning. Children derive enjoyment from demonstrating they can follow the simple rule of not touching their holiday visitor. And being able to resist temptation helps build character. But the occasional accident is understandable. Go easy on kids if it happens. Ultimately, the elf’s role is to spark imagination and fun rather than strict discipline. Keeping his magic alive through a hands-off approach brings positive spirit to the season.