Gossiping is a common human behavior that involves sharing information, true or untrue, about others. Some people gossip more than others, and there are individual differences in gossiping tendencies. An interesting question is whether people with narcissistic personality traits are more likely to gossip than others. In this article, we will explore the connection between narcissism and gossip.
What is narcissism?
Narcissism is a personality trait characterized by grandiosity, pride, egotism, and a lack of empathy. Narcissists tend to have an inflated sense of self-importance and feel entitled to special treatment. They crave attention and admiration from others and can be exploitive in their interpersonal relationships.
Some key characteristics of narcissistic personality include:
- Exaggerated sense of self-importance
- Preoccupation with fantasies of success, power, beauty, etc.
- Belief in being special and unique
- Sense of entitlement
- Exploitativeness of others
- Lack of empathy
- Envious of others or believes others are envious of them
- Arrogant behaviors and attitudes
Narcissism exists on a spectrum, with narcissistic personality disorder representing the extreme end. Many people can exhibit some narcissistic qualities without meeting the clinical threshold for full-blown NPD.
What is gossiping?
Gossiping involves sharing sensational or intimate information about someone else. Gossip often includes:
- Information about other people’s personal lives
- Commentary on someone’s private behaviors, relationships, or scandals
- Rumors or unverified accounts about others, regardless of truth
- Evaluative judgments of others
Gossip serves social functions like entertainment and bonding, but can be harmful if mean-spirited, invasive, or untrue. Most people gossip to some degree, but compulsive gossiping is seen as socially undesirable.
Are narcissists likely to gossip more?
Several characteristics of narcissism suggest those high in narcissism may be prone to gossiping more frequently and maliciously than others:
- Lack of empathy – narcissists don’t consider how gossip affects targets
- Need for attention – gossip draws attention from listeners
- Desire to self-promote – narcissists use gossip to shine favorable light on themselves
- Competitiveness – gossip can be a tactic to undermine rivals
- Boredom – gossip provides entertainment to fill a need for constant stimulation
- Belief in entitlement – narcissists feel entitled to share others’ private information
Narcissists may use gossip strategically to manage their self-image or destabilize competitors. Their ego-driven social style lends itself to judgmental talk about others for entertainment and advantage.
What does research say about narcissism and gossip?
Empirical studies demonstrate connections between narcissism and gossip:
- A 2020 study found narcissism positively predicted engagement in workplace gossip. Narcissists reported gossiping more frequently than less narcissistic colleagues.1
- A 2017 study showed narcissists were more likely to spread rumors about a hypothetical competitor to undermine their chances of winning a competition. This supports gossip as a strategic tool for narcissists.2
- Research from 2011 found narcissists were more likely to respond to negative gossip about a famous person by further attacking their reputation. Narcissists engaged in more malicious gossip.3
- A 2016 study revealed narcissists felt more “schadenfreude” pleasure at a rival’s misfortunes. They also spread more negative gossip about the rival’s failure.4
| Study | Key Finding |
|---|---|
| Lyons & Hughes, 2020 | Narcissism positively predicted engagement in workplace gossip. |
| Czarna et al., 2017 | Narcissists more likely to spread negative rumors about competitors. |
| Farley, 2011 | Narcissists responded to gossip by attacking target’s reputation more. |
| Lanzetta & Engelberg, 2016 | Narcissists felt more pleasure at rival’s failure and spread negative gossip. |
While more research is needed, these initial findings converge to suggest narcissism is associated with a tendency to gossip frequently and maliciously.
Limitations of Existing Research
Some limitations to note about current studies on narcissism and gossip:
- Most research relies on self-reports, which could be biased
- Little data exists on real-world narcissistic gossiping behavior
- Small sample sizes in experiments limit generalizability
- Mechanisms connecting narcissism and gossip need further exploration
More work observing naturalistic gossiping behaviors and teasing apart mediators is needed.
Why are narcissists prone to gossiping?
Several characteristics of narcissistic personality provide clues as to why gossip comes naturally to them:
Need for Attention
Narcissists crave attention and admiration from others. Gossiping can serve this need by drawing listeners into dramatic stories that spotlight the gossipers’ access to secret information. Spreading juicy rumors also feeds narcissists’ sense of being “in the know.”
Lack of Empathy
Narcissists lack empathy and don’t fully consider the feelings of gossip targets. Their cold nature may make them prone to nastier, socially irresponsible gossip without concern for consequences. Empathetic people are less likely to gossip in ways that damage reputations.
Desire to Feel Superior
Narcissists desire to establish their superiority. Putting others down through gossip asserts their high status. Malicious gossip also damages potential competitors and elevates the narcissists’ own standing.
Manipulativeness
Narcissists can be highly manipulative and Machiavellian. Spreading rumors about rivals can strategically undermine and discredit them. Calculated gossip advances the narcissist’s self-interests.
Boredom
Narcissists often feel empty inside and require constant entertainment and drama. Trading gossip can provide stimulation and amusement. Sharing shocking private details about others is intrinsically exciting.
Echo Chamber of Enablers
Narcissists often surround themselves with sycophants who applaud and reinforce their boasts and put-downs rather than discouraging gossip. This echo chamber removes social inhibitions against excessive gossip.
Do all narcissists gossip? Individual differences
While narcissism increases gossip tendencies, not all narcissists are big gossipers. Individual differences in extraversion, intellect, and culture may create variability:
- Extraverts – More outgoing narcissists have more social opportunities to gossip and bond over shared rumors.
- Cognitive abilities – Smarter narcissists better understand reputational consequences and gossip more strategically.
- Social norms – Cultural standards against gossiping may inhibit public narcissistic gossiping.
Furthermore, different narcissistic subtypes exist. “Exhibitionist” narcissists openly crave attention while “closet” narcissists quietly feel grandiose. Exhibitionists may gossip more actively.
What are alternatives to narcissistic gossiping?
For narcissists prone to frequent harmful gossip, some alternatives include:
- Find other entertaiment – Seek healthy amusement that doesn’t depend on spreading rumors.
- Develop empathy – Consider the humanity and feelings of gossip targets.
- Volunteer – Helping others can reduce self-absorption and teach empathy.
- Practice mindfulness – Increase present-focused awareness to catch and stop judgmental gossip thoughts.
- Keep a journal – Record thoughts privately rather than sharing them as public gossip.
- Limit enablers – Avoid friends or family members who egg on and reinforce narcissistic gossip.
Therapy can also help narcissists work through insecurities driving gossip and learn skills for healthier socializing.
Conclusion
In summary, considerable evidence suggests narcissism is linked to a greater tendency to engage in frequent, self-serving gossip. Narcissists’ need for attention and admiration, lack of empathy, hyper-competitiveness, manipulativeness, and difficulty with boredom all enable gossiping behaviors. Not all narcissists will gossip to the same degree, however, due to individual differences in extraversion, intellect, and cultural norms. With self-awareness and effort, narcissists can find more constructive ways to connect with others, entertain themselves, and establish status that don’t rely on harmful gossip.