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Do people flush their miscarriages?

Miscarriage, also known as spontaneous abortion, is when a pregnancy ends unexpectedly before the 20th week. It is estimated that 10-20% of known pregnancies end in miscarriage, most often in the first trimester. Miscarriage can be an emotionally devastating experience for parents, especially if it occurs recurrently.

Causes of Miscarriage

There are many possible causes of miscarriage, some related to the mother and some related to the fetus. Some of the most common causes include:

  • Chromosomal abnormalities in the fetus
  • Hormonal problems or imbalances
  • Uterine or cervical abnormalities
  • Autoimmune disorders like lupus
  • Thyroid disease
  • Infections
  • Medical conditions like diabetes and blood clotting disorders
  • Lifestyle factors like smoking, drug use, malnutrition
  • Advanced maternal age

In many cases, the exact cause cannot be identified. Recurrent miscarriages may indicate an underlying health condition in one of the parents that requires medical investigation and treatment.

Signs and Symptoms

The most common signs and symptoms of a miscarriage include:

  • Vaginal spotting or bleeding
  • Cramping pain in the lower back or abdomen
  • Passing of blood clots or fetal tissue from the vagina
  • No longer experiencing signs of pregnancy like nausea and breast soreness

Heavy bleeding and severe cramping are signs that the miscarriage is in progress. Mild spotting and cramps can sometimes be normal in early pregnancy, but any concerning symptoms should be evaluated by a doctor.

Management

There are three main options for management when a miscarriage occurs:

  1. Expectant management – Letting the miscarriage happen naturally on its own. This avoids medical procedures and lets nature take its course.
  2. Medical management – Using medication like misoprostol to induce uterine contractions and empty the uterus.
  3. Surgical management – Having a dilation and curettage (D&C) procedure to remove any remaining tissue from the uterus.

The choice depends on factors like how far along the pregnancy was, personal preference, and health status. Close follow-up is needed after any type of management to ensure the miscarriage completed properly.

Care After Miscarriage

Proper self-care is very important during and after a miscarriage both physically and emotionally. Recommendations include:

  • Getting lots of rest
  • Staying hydrated and eating a balanced diet
  • Avoiding strenuous activity for 2 weeks
  • Taking time to grieve and process the loss
  • Seeking counseling or support if needed
  • Delaying trying to conceive again until fully recovered

It’s normal to feel a wide range of emotions like sadness, guilt, or anger after miscarriage. Be patient and kind to yourself during the healing process.

Risk of Miscarriage by Week

The risk of miscarriage varies by gestational age. Here is the approximate miscarriage risk by pregnancy week:

Week Risk of Miscarriage
4 weeks 10-25%
5 weeks 10-15%
6 weeks 5-10%
7-8 weeks 3-5%
9-13 weeks 1-5%
After 13 weeks <1%

As can be seen, the risk drops quickly after the 4th week and is very low after the 1st trimester. But miscarriage can still occur even late in pregnancy in rare cases.

Emotional and Psychological Impact

Along with the obvious grief of losing a baby, women and their partners can struggle with a range of difficult feelings after miscarriage like:

  • Shock and disbelief
  • Guilt about possibly causing the miscarriage
  • Jealousy of others with successful pregnancies
  • Anxiety about trying to conceive again
  • Anger at medical staff or at life in general
  • Depression and sadness about the loss

Mental health support from loved ones, counseling services, miscarriage support groups, hotlines, or online communities can help people cope in the aftermath of miscarriage. For many, the grief slowly fades with time.

Partners

Partners can feel profoundly sad about the loss of their unborn baby as well. They may bottle up grief and try to stay strong for the woman. Partners should also take time to mourn and get support. Couples counseling can help partners understand each other’s grieving process.

Subsequent Pregnancies After Loss

Most women who miscarry go on to have healthy pregnancies later. Recurrent miscarriage, defined as 3 or more losses in a row, affects about 1% of couples trying to conceive. After in-depth medical evaluation, about 50% of recurrent miscarriage cases have no identifiable cause.

A history of miscarriage does not necessarily indicate underlying fertility problems or reduce the chances of eventually carrying a pregnancy successfully to term. But it’s understandable for anxiety levels to be high in a subsequent pregnancy after loss. Important coping tips include:

  • Communicating any fears or concerns with your partner and doctor
  • Allowing yourself to feel hopeful about the pregnancy
  • Focusing on what you can control and letting go of the rest
  • Reducing stress through meditation, yoga, therapy, support groups
  • Taking it one day at a time and celebrating milestones

Can Miscarriage Tissue Be Flushed?

This is one of the most common questions women have after miscarriage. Small tissue passed naturally may be flushed down the toilet. Clots and larger tissue should be placed in a container and buried or cremated. Speak to your doctor about proper handling based on the gestational age and amount of tissue.

The fetus should always be treated respectfully, as you would any other human remains. Flushing extensive fetal remains can clog plumbing and waste management systems.

Why People May Flush Remains

Here are some reasons women may feel compelled to flush fetal remains from an early miscarriage:

  • Wanting privacy and secrecy about the loss
  • Fears the tissue may appear upsetting
  • Unsure what to do and flushing seems easiest
  • Advice from others to flush remains
  • Lack of guidance from medical staff

While flushing may seem discreet, it can cause health hazards and additional emotional trauma down the line. Sensitive counseling and aftercare advice from medical professionals can prevent improper disposal.

Coping with Guilt

Some women feel intense guilt at the idea of flushing remains. They may have panic attacks or nightmares about causing a sewage blockage. Speaking with a counselor can help resolve these fears and make peace with any past decision to flush tissue.

The grief over pregnancy loss is healing. With time and support, the intense feelings of guilt and sorrow will lessen. It’s important to show compassion to yourself.

Other Options for Pregnancy Remains

If you miscarry at home, here are some other options beyond flushing to handle any tissue passed:

  • Place in a small box and bury in the garden, plant a tree or flowers over top.
  • Double bag and place with other household waste for pickup and proper disposal.
  • Contact local funeral homes about cremation services for fetal remains.
  • Have a small private funeral ceremony, burial, or scattering of ashes.

Some hospitals offer services like communal cremation, burial, or memorial ceremonies for families who miscarry under their care. Ask your provider about options to honor the loss.

Public Awareness about Miscarriage

Despite being sadly common, miscarriage is not often publicly discussed. Some reasons it remains shrouded in secrecy:

  • Women feel private grief over the failed pregnancy.
  • Friends and family may not know how to offer comfort.
  • Partners grieve but try to stay strong for the woman.
  • Medical system often focuses on physical recovery.
  • Cultural taboos around talking about fertility issues.
  • Women fear being blamed or shamed unfairly.

But as more people speak out about pregnancy loss, the stigma is slowly lifting. Celebrities like Beyonce, Chrissy Teigen, and Carrie Underwood sharing their stories provides validation and comfort for many. Online support groups allow people to connect in their grief without judgment.

Compassionate public dialogue about miscarriage raises awareness and helps families heal. Recognizing miscarriage as the profound loss that it is for countless mothers and fathers can bring comfort and connection.

Recommendations for Improved Care

Here are some recommendations for how the healthcare system and society can better support women and families experiencing miscarriage:

  • Thorough counseling about all options for management and grieving.
  • Sensitive medical guidance on handling fetal remains.
  • Follow-up mental health support and grief resources.
  • Specialized care for recurrent pregnancy loss.
  • Paid miscarriage leave policies in the workplace.
  • Public awareness campaigns to lift stigma.
  • Education on preventing high-risk behaviors during pregnancy.
  • Compassionate listening and removing any unfair blame.

Conclusion

Miscarriage is a heartbreaking type of loss that so many families experience. Although common, pregnancy loss is rarely discussed openly. Many resort to flushing remains out of desperation, uncertainty, or secrecy about their story. With proper medical guidance and emotional support, families can find healthier ways to grieve, honor their baby, and eventually heal.

Raising public awareness and compassion about miscarriage can help lift the silence and stigma. Families who lose a baby deserve extensive care and time to grieve without blame or shame. As more share their stories, those enduring this deep pain may find comfort in knowing they are not alone.