Having siblings is a common experience for children around the world. Over 80% of people grow up with one or more siblings. This leads many parents to wonder: does having brothers and sisters make kids happier overall?
There are arguments on both sides of this debate. Some studies have found that only children are just as happy as those with siblings. However, the preponderance of research suggests that having siblings provides important psychological and social benefits for children.
Potential benefits of having siblings
Here are some of the main ways that researchers believe growing up with siblings may lead to greater happiness and well-being:
- Companionship – Siblings provide built-in playmates and friends during childhood. Even siblings with large age gaps tend to report feeling close to one another.
- Social skills – Interacting with siblings helps children learn relationship skills like conflict resolution, cooperation, and empathy early in life.
- Character building – Having siblings teaches qualities like responsibility, patience, and problem-solving as children navigate sibling dynamics.
- Emotional stability – The presence of siblings may help some children cope better with stressful events like parental divorce or death.
- Fewer loneliness and boredom – Children with siblings report less loneliness, isolation, and boredom than only children.
- Confidence – Sibling relationships allow children to safely practice social skills that lead to greater confidence among peers.
Research has linked all of these factors with increased happiness and life satisfaction during childhood. There are also potential lifelong impacts. Adults who grew up with siblings tend to have stronger social networks and lower rates of depression compared to only children.
Challenges of having siblings
However, having siblings can also introduce some challenges that may impact children’s happiness:
- Sibling rivalry – Competition and conflicts between siblings are common, especially when children are close in age.
- Sharing resources – Children with siblings get less individual time and attention from parents compared to only children.
- Comparison – Siblings may compare their own accomplishments to their siblings’ achievements.
- Teasing and bullying – In some families, siblings persistently pick on or belittle one another.
- Change in family dynamic – A new baby can temporarily reduce the attention firstborns receive from parents.
- Clashing personalities – Siblings may not get along well depending on differences in their temperaments and interests.
These factors have the potential to cause short-term stress or unhappiness. However, sibling conflicts also provide an arena for children to learn how to navigate disagreements. Overall, most research suggests the benefits outweigh the disadvantages in the long run.
Only children: Just as happy?
What about children who grow up without siblings? Several past studies found little difference in the happiness of only children compared to those with siblings:
- A 1991 meta-analysis found only children scored just as well in areas like achievement, intelligence, self-esteem, and popularity.
- A 2003 study by Toni Falbo found that only children were just as well-adjusted and satisfied with friendships and life as those with siblings.
- Research in 2013 showed parental involvement and stable family environments mattered more for only children’s well-being than the presence of siblings.
Based on these findings, some experts argue parents should not feel pressured to have a second child for the sake of their firstborn’s happiness. However, more recent large studies have challenged the idea that only children are just as happy as those with siblings.
More recent research
Larger and longer-term studies using data on thousands of children suggest siblings do provide some lifelong well-being benefits:
- A 2015 study using data on nearly 3 million people in the Netherlands found those with sisters were less likely to face psychological issues as adults compared to only children.
- Research on data from the China Family Panel Studies in 2017 showed children with siblings scored higher on assessments of psychological well-being.
- Another 2017 study using a sample of over 13,000 children found those with siblings tended to be less depressed and more socially adept throughout childhood and adolescence.
- A 20-year study in Germany reported that adult sibling relationships provided mood benefits. Adults who felt close to their living siblings had fewer symptoms of depression.
The authors of the most recent studies argue past research on only children had limitations like small sample sizes or limited age ranges. The emerging research consensus is that siblings do provide real psychological benefits compared to growing up alone.
How number of siblings impacts happiness
Research also suggests the exact number of siblings a child has can impact well-being.
Some studies have found a “Goldilocks zone” where having 2-3 siblings seems to provide the most benefits. For example:
- A study of over 1 million Swedes found 3-4 siblings was optimal in terms of promoting higher education and income later in life.
- Australian research reported children with 2 siblings scored better on cognitive assessments than those with 1 or 3+ siblings.
- A review of research identified the most consistent well-being benefits for children with 2-3 siblings.
Why does this moderate number seem ideal? Researchers propose that having too many siblings starts to dilute parental resources and attention. But this does not provide conclusive evidence children are always happiest with exactly 2-3 siblings.
Only children can still be happy
While research suggests siblings on average provide some well-being benefits, there are also millions of only children who grow into perfectly well-adjusted, fulfilled adults. Parental support is a key factor helping counterbalance any disadvantages of growing up alone.
Some studies report only children have closer relationships with parents and receive more focused investment of time, attention, and resources compared to those with siblings. This allows parents to tailor their parenting approach to best suit their one child. With mindful parenting, children can thrive whether they grow up with siblings or not.
Conclusion
Decades of research suggest siblings do positively impact childhood happiness on average. The social interaction and companionship of growing up with brothers and sisters appears to provide practice in skills that benefit well-being throughout life.
However, parents should not feel pressured to have more children solely for this reason. Factors like family resources and parental capabilities are critical. With attentive and individualized parenting, only children can grow up just as happy and capable as those with siblings.