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Do the parents know the gender at a baby shower?

A baby shower is a party held to celebrate the impending birth of a baby and “shower” the new parents with gifts. Traditionally, baby showers are held for first-time mothers and organized by her female friends and relatives. Some key questions around baby showers include whether the parents know the gender of their baby and whether this impacts the celebration.

Do parents find out the baby’s gender before the shower?

There are a few factors that influence whether parents find out the gender of their baby before the baby shower:

  • Ultrasound technology – Ultrasounds during pregnancy can detect the baby’s gender as early as 15-20 weeks. Finding out the gender early is now a possibility for many parents.
  • Personal preference – Some parents want to be surprised at the birth and opt not to find out. Others want to know as early as possible to plan names, nurseries, etc.
  • Shower timing – Showers are often held starting around 7 months into the pregnancy. At this point, many parents do know the gender if they want to find out.

According to surveys, approximately 60-70% of parents now find out their baby’s gender before the shower. But a minority still prefer to be surprised.

Does knowing the gender affect the baby shower?

Knowing the baby’s gender can impact a baby shower in several ways:

  • Decorations – Decor is often gender-themed (pink or blue) if the gender is known.
  • Gifts – Guests may shop for more gender-specific clothing and toys.
  • Games – Shower games can incorporate the gender, like guessing the delivery date for a boy or girl.
  • Name reveal – The parents may formally share their name choice at the shower.

However, the shower does not have to be totally gender-focused. Even if they know, the parents may opt for neutral colors and themes. The focus can still be on welcoming a new baby in general.

Do gifts depend on knowing the gender?

In today’s socially conscious environment, there is a push for less gender-focused gift-giving. Useful staple items like diapers, blankets, bottles, and infant care items are always needed, regardless of the gender. So the parents’ registry doesn’t have to be overly gendered.

However, some guests still enjoy shopping gender-specific gifts. Some differences may include:

  • Boy gifts – Onesies with trucks or sports themes, little ties, dino toys
  • Girl gifts – Headbands, tutus, pink onesies, doll toys

If guests know the gender, they can have fun tailoring some gifts while still providing everyday essentials too.

Are gender reveals a part of showers?

Gender reveal parties have become a popular trend for expectant parents to announce the gender of their baby. These are typically separate parties before the shower.

However, parents may opt to incorporate a gender reveal into the baby shower itself:

  • Cake cutting – Pink or blue cake inside
  • Opening a box or piñata
  • Popping a balloon
  • Opening an envelope

This allows the gender surprise to be part of the overall shower celebration with family and friends.

How can games incorporate gender?

If the baby’s gender is known, parents can incorporate it into special shower games and activities:

  • “Guess the Due Date” jar – Guests guess boy or girl
  • Advice cards for mom – Split by boy or girl advice
  • “What Will Baby Look Like?” game – Using parents’ baby photos
  • Name game – Guessing baby name options based on gender

This makes the shower specific to the baby on the way. However, non-gendered games can focus on baby advice, baby trivia, mom advice, and nursery rhymes.

Should guests be informed of the gender?

If the parents know the gender before the invitations go out, it’s up to their discretion whether to share ahead or keep it a surprise. There are pros and cons to each approach:

Share Gender Before Keep Gender Secret
  • Lets guests shop gender-specific gifts
  • Enables gender-themed decoration prep
  • Avoids duplicate gender neutral gifts
  • Maintains a fun reveal surprise
  • Encourages essential practical gifts
  • Allows neutral theme and colors

There’s no right or wrong way. The parents should do what feels best for them and their celebration.

Are gender assumptions made if it’s unknown?

If the parents opt not to find out the gender, shower guests may make some assumptions like:

  • Guessing or asking parents their hunch
  • Assuming traditional roles – mom wants a girl, dad wants a boy
  • Buying some clothes and toys traditionally for one gender

To avoid too many assumptions, parents can:

  • Expressly request gender-neutral gifts and colors
  • Register for practical, genderless items
  • Plan non-gendered games and activities

Letting guests know clearly the gender is unknown helps set expectations.

Is a co-ed shower impacted by gender?

Traditional showers were female-focused events. But co-ed showers for both parents are increasingly popular.

Knowing the gender can help make a co-ed shower inclusive. Some ideas include:

  • Gender-themed venue and food
  • Including men in games – guessing delivery dates or baby food tasting for dad
  • Planning joint parenting advice activities

The mom and dad-to-be can jointly celebrate their son or daughter on the way.

Should expectant parents tell others the gender?

It’s up to the parents on who they want to tell the gender to before the shower:

  • Immediate family – Often told first
  • Close friends – May want input on name ideas
  • Acquaintances – May opt to keep it more private
  • Social media – Some post online, others wait

Factors like the parents’ personalities, their circle of trust, and wanting a big reveal may impact who knows before the event.

Conclusion

Knowing a baby’s gender can shape certain aspects of a baby shower, but parents can still opt for a non-gendered event if they prefer. While some anticipation may build if the gender is kept a secret, the main focus is celebrating a new baby’s pending arrival with loved ones. Parents should do what makes them most comfortable when it comes to finding out and sharing their baby’s gender.