The kiss at the end of the wedding ceremony is one of the most iconic images of a wedding. However, traditions and practices vary between religions and cultures. For Catholic weddings, kissing at the end of the ceremony is typical, though there are some specific rules and guidelines that Catholic couples follow.
In this article, we’ll look at the history and significance of the wedding kiss in Catholic tradition. We’ll explore:
- The origins and meaning behind the wedding kiss
- The Catholic Church’s rules about kissing during the ceremony
- When the bride and groom share their first kiss
- Alternative options if a couple prefers not to kiss
- Other Catholic wedding traditions related to the kiss
Understanding the traditions around the wedding kiss can help Catholic couples make informed decisions about this special moment in their ceremony.
The History and Meaning of the Wedding Kiss
The kiss has long held a symbolic meaning in marriage ceremonies across cultures. Ancient Romans kissed to seal legal bonds, while in the Middle Ages a couple’s kiss signified their spiritual union.
Some potential origins for the wedding kiss tradition include:
- Sealing the marriage contract – In many societies historically, a kiss represented a legal bond.
- Exchange of souls – Many believed the breath shared in a kiss represented the exchange of souls.
- Taste of the marriage – By kissing, the couple would taste and savor their new marriage.
- First act of intimacy – A kiss was the first act of physical intimacy in the couple’s married life.
In the Catholic tradition specifically, the kiss traditionally symbolizes the couple’s marriage covenant. When the spouses kiss, they are sealing their vows and God’s blessing of their new union. It mirrors the kiss given to the Bible during the ceremony, which seals the couple’s spiritual commitment.
The Catholic Church’s Rules on Kissing
Kissing during a Catholic wedding ceremony is allowed, but must follow certain guidelines:
- The couple should kiss only after being officially pronounced married by the priest.
- The kiss should be brief and modest to match the solemnity of the sacrament.
- Prolonged, inappropriate, or especially intimate kissing is not permitted during the ceremony.
- The priest may instruct the groom to give the bride a chaste kiss on the cheek instead of an open-mouthed kiss.
The Catholic Church offers these guidelines to preserve the dignity of the sacrament of marriage. However, a modest, symbolic kiss is still encouraged as a beautiful representation of the couple’s union in Christ.
When Do They Kiss?
In a Catholic wedding ceremony, the symbolic kiss occurs right after the priest officiates the marriage.
The sequence is as follows:
- The vows: The bride and groom face each other and declare their marriage vows.
- The blessing: The priest offers a nuptial blessing over the couple.
- The pronouncement: The priest officially declares the couple as married.
- The kiss: The newly pronounced husband and wife share a kiss to seal their union.
This is typically followed by a formal introduction of the couple as spouses for the first time.
So the wedding kiss is reserved as a symbolic capstone, only taking place after the couple is fully and officially married.
Alternative Options
Some Catholic couples may prefer to forego the wedding kiss, perhaps due to shyness or cultural factors. This is perfectly acceptable – the kiss during the ceremony is not required.
Here are some appropriate alternatives:
- Kiss on the cheek instead of lips
- Simple hug or holding hands
- Bowing heads towards each other without actual contact
- No contact at all
The priest can work with the couple to find comfortable options that still honor the solemnity of the sacrament. There are many other beautiful symbols of unity besides the kiss.
Related Traditions
Beyond the wedding kiss, Catholic ceremonies often include other meaningful rituals:
Unity Candle
After lighting individual candles, the bride and groom jointly light a central unity candle representing the joining of their lives.
Cord/Lasso Ceremony
The couple is wrapped in a figure-eight cord symbolizing their eternal bond.
Arrás
Thirteen coins are blessed and presented to the bride, promising groom’s dedication to her wellbeing.
La Horquilla
Prayerful placement of a comb in the bride’s hair wishes her tranquility and orderliness in married life.
And many more…
Catholic weddings are rich with tradition and ritual. The wedding kiss is an optional but meaningful part of that heritage. With so many beautiful symbols to choose from, Catholic couples can craft a ceremony that honors their love in the eyes of God.
Conclusion
Kissing at the end of a Catholic wedding is a venerable tradition, though not an obligatory one. For couples who do choose to kiss, it should be brief, modest, and occur only after being pronounced husband and wife. Alternatives like a kiss on the cheek or no kiss at all are also perfectly acceptable. More important than the kiss itself is the sincerity of the couple’s vows before God. Whatever form their unity takes, a Catholic wedding ceremony offers rich symbolism to launch couples into a blessed and grace-filled marriage.