Texting has become one of the most common ways for people to communicate in the modern world. For many, it is a convenient and comfortable way to stay connected. This is especially true when it comes to dating and flirting. Texting allows people to take more time to craft clever or thoughtful messages. It also creates opportunities to flirt that might not exist during face-to-face interactions.
Flirting over text can be exciting, but it also comes with its challenges. Some struggle to translate their wit and charm into written messages. There are many important factors to keep in mind when flirting with someone over text. Understanding how to flirt with the written word takes effort, tact, and creativity.
The way people flirt over text says a lot about their personality and communication style. There are countless approaches, but some key techniques do tend to work better than others. Knowing how to effectively flirt with someone through witty banter or thoughtful remarks can help create meaningful connections.
Be Playful and Positive
One of the most important aspects of texting flirtation is to keep things lighthearted and positive. Trading playful messages helps create chemistry and enables both parties to safely test the waters without feeling too vulnerable. Flirting serves as a way to subtly express interest and gauge whether it is reciprocated.
Guys who want to flirt through texts should aim to be silly and fun. Responding to messages in creative ways shows that you have a good sense of humor. Teasing gently shows that you feel comfortable enough to joke around. Just be sure never to say anything offensive or cross any lines. Flirting should feel safe for everyone involved.
Using positive language and compliments can also contribute to an enjoyable, flirtatious exchange. Comments on appearance, like “that color looks great on you” or “cool haircut,” are usually well received. More subtle compliments can be given too, like telling someone they have good taste in music or that they always make you laugh. A little bit of praise and positivity goes a long way.
Be Curious and Ask Questions
Moving the conversation along by asking light, engaging questions is a great texting tactic when trying to flirt. People usually like talking about themselves, so asking questions shows your interest. It also keeps the exchange balanced, rather than just talking about yourself.
Questions that are observant, like “how was the big meeting you were nervous about?” demonstrate that you pay attention to what the other person says. Fun questions like “what emoji best describes your day so far?” or “what song have you had stuck in your head lately?” add a creative element. More personal questions about hobbies, places someone wants to travel, or favorite childhood memories help you get to know each other better.
Making statements that keep the conversation open-ended can achieve the same goal. For example, saying something like “I’ve always wanted to visit Argentina, what’s on your travel bucket list?” invites the other person to ask about your dreams as well. Questions and open-ended comments show engagement and interest in learning more about the other person.
Use Emojis and GIFs
Emojis and GIFs have become extremely popular for personal communication, especially flirty text conversations. A well-timed emoji can convey a lot with just one character. The eyes emoji and smiley with hearts are common ways to flirt over text. Funny GIFs can also showcase your humor and personality.
Some other flirty emojis to consider are:
– Wink face 😉
– Face throwing a kiss 😘
– Smirking face 😏
– Lipstick mark 💋
– Blushing smiley 😊
– Red heart ❤️
Emojis and GIFs add color and visuals to a conversation that can otherwise feel flat. They help convey tone and feeling. Inserting emojis helps messages come across as lighthearted. Just be sure not to overdo it or fill every text with multiple emojis. A few here and there go a long way. Choose ones that feel natural and relevant to the conversation.
Compliment Appearance in a Respectful Way
Physical appearance is often one of the first things people notice about someone they feel attracted to. Giving compliments shows your interest in dating and desire to flirt. However, people have different comfort levels when it comes to appearance-related compliments. It’s important to avoid commenting on anything too personal or that could be perceived as objectifying.
Good ways for guys to compliment appearance over text include:
– “That’s a really pretty dress”
– “You look nice in blue”
– “Cute glasses!”
– “Love your hair in that pic”
– “Your smile is awesome”
Complimenting clothing choices, hairstyles, or accessories shows attraction in a respectful way. Commenting on body parts or physical features can come across as aggressive or make someone uncomfortable. Keep compliments focused on style and things within someone’s control.
Only compliment appearance if the other person seems open to it. Pay attention to how they respond. Some may prefer compliments on their talents, humor or other qualities instead. Adapt your flirting approach based on signals from the other person.
Use Creative Content
Texting exclusively in plain messages can become monotonous. Sending creative content like memes, videos, voice messages, photos or songs helps mix things up. This shows off more aspects of your personality and gives the other person new ways to respond.
Funny memes related to an inside joke or a recent conversation are engaging to receive. Voice messages have a more personal touch than standard texts. Some other creative ideas include:
– Snapping a quick picture of something cool you see.
– Sending a song or playlist that reminded you of them.
– Sharing funny videos you think they’d enjoy.
– Texting word games like Would You Rather or Two Truths and a Lie.
Getting creative with multimedia adds excitement to the conversation. It also shows you are willing to put in effort to keep things interesting. Someone may be even more likely to respond promptly when you send engaging content for them to react to.
Give Sincere Compliments
Everyone enjoys compliments on qualities beyond just appearance. Flattering someone’s abilities, personality traits, talents and accomplishments feels great. Sincere compliments show that you notice and appreciate things about who they are as a person.
Good ways for guys to give these types of compliments over text include:
– “You’re really funny, you always crack me up.”
– “I wish I were as good at guitar as you.”
– “You’re so knowledgeable about world history!”
– “You’re a really engaging storyteller.”
– “You have such a vibrant sense of personal style.”
Complimenting something specific like an ability, passion or area of expertise is more meaningful than a generic praise. Comments on sense of humor, intelligence, creativity, charm and other inner qualities build a genuine emotional connection. Just be sure the compliments are sincere, not so over-the-top that they seem disingenuous.
Reference Inside Jokes
Once you get to know someone better, inside jokes often develop. Referencing these in flirty texts helps strengthen your bond. It reminds the other person of positive moments you shared together.
Maybe you two had an awkward encounter or a funny miscommunication when you first met. Maybe there was an activity you both disliked at an event you attended. You could send a text saying “I just got dragged into another game of Scattergories” or “This dinner reminds me of our first date at that awful restaurant.”
These inside jokes call back moments that only the two of you understand. This creates a sense of intimacy. The other person will likely find it endearing that you remembered the details. Sending memes or reaction gifs related to your inside jokes can also be amusing.
Go for Thoughtful Over Cheesy
It can be tempting when flirting over text to use cliché, over-the-top romantic phrases. Some examples are “You’re the most gorgeous girl in the world” or “We were meant to be together.” But overly sweet comments can actually end up pushing the other person away or making them skeptical of your sincerity.
Focus on sharing thoughtful, personalized compliments instead. For example:
– “That leadership seminar really inspired you, I admire your dedication to self-improvement.”
– “The passion you have for helping animals is incredible, that shelter is so lucky to have you.”
– “You always pick the best movies to watch, your taste is fantastic.”
These specific, meaningful compliments feel more genuine. Do not just recycle cheesy lines. Take the time to notice what makes the other person special. Point out unique qualities and talents they demonstrate, or ways they have impacted you. This thoughtfulness will go a long way in showing sincere interest and making someone feel special.
Know When to Dial Back
Flirting should enhance the flow of a conversation and excite both parties. But it is possible to overdo it, especially in long text exchanges. If your flirting approaches start to feel forced or if you are not getting positive responses, dial things back a bit.
Signs you may need to scale back flirty texting include:
– They take much longer to respond or leave messages on read.
– They do not reciprocate with flirty comments of their own.
– Their responses become very short or vague.
If you get hints like these, try just having a regular friendly chat. Ask how their day is going, discuss topics they seem interested in, or send memes with no hidden motives. Then see if eventually the tone feels flirtier again organically. Give them breathing room and let the other person re-engage in their own time.
Flirting should enhance the flow of a conversation and excite both parties. But it is possible to overdo it, especially in long text exchanges. If your flirting approaches start to feel forced or if you are not getting positive responses, dial things back a bit.
Signs you may need to scale back flirty texting include:
– They take much longer to respond or leave messages on read.
– They do not reciprocate with flirty comments of their own.
– Their responses become very short or vague.
If you get hints like these, try just having a regular friendly chat. Ask how their day is going, discuss topics they seem interested in, or send memes with no hidden motives. Then see if eventually the tone feels flirtier again organically. Give them breathing room and let the other person re-engage in their own time.
Do Not Come on Too Strong
It is important when flirting not to come on too intensely right away. You want to gradually build rapport and gauge interest before making bolder overtures. Starting off overly eager can feel off-putting or intimidating. Hold back on anything too far forward until you know the other person reciprocates interest.
Avoid things like:
– Double or triple texting without a reply.
– Sending long romantic poems or song lyrics.
– Overusing heart/kiss emojis.
– Talking about marriage or forever after just meeting.
– Asking very personal or inappropriate questions.
These tactics can scare someone off by seeming too aggressive or desperate. Take your time getting to know the other person before making big romantic statements or planning future dates together. Let the flirtation and attraction grow slowly and steadily.
Do Not Just Text After Midnight
“U up?” late night texts have become synonymous with booty calls and hookups. If you are interested in someone seriously, avoid only messaging them super late at night. This can imply you just see them as a physical option when no one else is around. It can also feel inconsiderate if the other person has an early bedtime.
That is not to say flirty late night texts are always a bad idea. If you two have already been chatting throughout the day, a sweet goodnight message with emoji kisses can be endearing. Responding to their story after 9pm now and then is fine too.
Just be sure not to start conversations only late at night, especially on the weekends. Mix in thoughtful daytime texts as well to show the other person they are on your mind around the clock. You want to demonstrate sincere interest, not just late-night lust.
Do Not Just Text Sexual Compliments
Outright sexual comments and flirting have their place, but typically not before establishing mutual interest and comfort. Coming on too sexual too soon, especially unprompted, can make the other person extremely uncomfortable. Send flirty but non-explicit texts at first to test the waters.
Avoid sending random messages like:
– “Your body is so hot”
– “You turn me on so much”
– “I was thinking about you in the shower…”
These overly forward advances often kill the flirtatious mood rather than enhance it. Wait to see if the other person reciprocates flirtation and gives you positive signals first. Then gradually escalate to more sexual compliments once you both indicate readiness.
Ask to Continue the Conversation in Person
After flirting back and forth over text for a bit, it is normal to want to spend time together in person. Avoid vaguely saying “We should hang out sometime.” Instead, be clear it is meant as a date and suggest a specific day, time and activity.
Examples include:
– “Would you want to get dinner with me this Friday?”
– “I’d love to take you to the new art exhibit on Saturday if you’re free.”
– “Can I take you out for ice cream on Thursday? There’s a great new shop I think you’d like.”
Suggesting a date at a set time shows confidence and planning. Having an activity in mind makes it feel more special than just “hanging out.” If the other person seems interested in you, they will likely appreciate the initiative to move things forward. Just do not get upset if they have other plans or need to reschedule. Be flexible and set up another day.
Do Not Come Across As Needy
It is normal to get excited when flirting with someone over text. But you want to avoid seeming desperate or obsessed. Playing it cool can heighten the chemistry and make the other person even more intrigued. Moving too fast or forcing conversations too often looks needy and drives people away.
Signs of neediness to avoid include:
– Texting way more frequently than they do.
– Getting upset if they do not respond immediately.
– Sending multiple unanswered texts in a row.
– Pressuring them to meet before they are ready.
Everyone is busy and may not always be able to text back right away. Give the other person space. Focus on quality over quantity of messages, and do not demand constant communication. Be patient if plans need to be rescheduled. Texting should not feel like a chore or obligation to them.
Conclusion
Flirting over text has nuances and unwritten rules that may feel confusing. But following some basic guidelines around playfulness, respect, thoughtfulness and moderation can set you up for success. Pay attention to how the other person responds to see if your flirting tactics are well received. Be prepared to recalibrate if needed to make them feel comfortable.
With the right balance of charm, effort and consideration, texting can provide exciting opportunities to build attraction. A thoughtful compliment here, a witty inside joke there, and strategic use of emojis and creative content can help you express interest while getting to know each other better. Just be sincere, take it slowly, and do not force conversation. Meeting in person and continuing to learn about one another should remain the priority.
Flirting should be fun and reciprocal. With practice and care, texting can be a great medium for playful banter and showing someone you genuinely care. The most important texting tips for guys to remember are: listen more than you speak, be respectful of boundaries, and do not take responses too personally. Learning each other’s texting styles helps prevent miscommunication. With the right balance of humor, sincerity and empathy, text flirtation can lead to meaningful connections.