How do you show respect in Japan?

Showing respect is an incredibly important part of Japanese culture. There are many traditions and customs in Japan that revolve around displaying respect, especially towards those viewed as superiors or elders. When visiting Japan, it is essential to learn proper etiquette to avoid offending locals.

Table of Contents

Bowing

One of the most recognizable signs of showing respect in Japan is the bow. Bowing is done frequently in social situations and ranges from a slight nod of the head to a deep bend at the waist. In general, the deeper the bow, the more respect it conveys.

Here are some bowing tips to keep in mind:

A light bow of about 15 degrees is appropriate for casual greetings with friends or peers.
Bow about 30 degrees for strangers, colleagues, or casual acquaintances.

A bow of 45 degrees shows great respect and is suitable when meeting someone higher ranking such as a manager, elder, or esteemed guest.
Bend from the waist to bow the deepest at about 90 degrees. This profoundly respectful bow is reserved for the most formal occasions.

When bowing, it is also important to keep eye contact, smile warmly, and avoid bowing too frequently which may seem disingenuous.

Using Honorifics

The Japanese language has a complex system of honorifics which serve to convey respect to the person being addressed or spoken about. Honorific titles and verb conjugations reflect the relationship between the speaker and who they are referring to.

Here are some examples of Japanese honorifics:

-san – Most common and safest honorific used like Mr, Ms, Mrs. Attaches to both surnames and first names.

-sama – More respectful version of -san. Used for highly respected customers or elders.
-kun – Informal and friendly, used for male children, friends, and social inferiors.
-chan – Informal and affectionate, mainly used for young children, babies, and teenage girls.

Sensei – Used for teachers, doctors, and masters of any profession.
Sempai/Kohai – Used between mentor/apprentice or senior/junior relationship.

It is safest to use -san unless you are certain of someone’s status. Getting honorifics wrong could cause offense.

Giving and Receiving Business Cards

Exchanging business cards is a very common and important practice when meeting someone new in Japan, especially in business settings. It is a way to formally introduce yourself, show interest in the other person, and establish a relationship.

Here is proper etiquette for giving and receiving business cards:

Present your card holding it with both hands and turned so the recipient can read it.

Take the time to look over the received card carefully and do not simply pocket or toss it aside.
Treat cards respectfully. Do not write on someone’s card in their presence.
If speaking through a translator, allow them to facilitate the card exchange.

Have one side of your card translated to Japanese including your title/role.
Bring plenty of cards as exchanging many in a day is common.

Gift Giving Customs

Gift giving is another valuable part of showing respect and politeness in Japan. There are specific cultural rules and protocols to follow to avoid missteps.

Here is advice on proper gift giving etiquette:

Gifts are given for major holidays, weddings, funerals, visiting others’ homes, and as thank you’s.
Wrap gifts beautifully in formal wrapping paper, avoid excessively decorated paper.

Do not wrap in black or white paper.
Avoid giving four or nine of anything as those numbers have superstitious connotations.
Bring high quality fruit, sweets, or sake when invited to someone’s home.

Give practical presents like pens instead of more personal items.
Open gifts carefully without ripping the paper.
Send formal thank you notes promptly after receiving a gift.

Using Appropriate Titles

Using respectful titles and avoiding over-familiarity is key in Japan. Referring to someone appropriately reflects politeness and sensitivity towards social positions. Here are some tips on using proper Japanese titles:

Address people by their surname + honorific unless you are very close.
Older individuals should be addressed as Sempai, Onii-san/Onee-san etc.

Do not use someone’s first name unless they request it.
Use professional titles whenever possible and appropriate.
Avoid referring to others with pronouns like “you”. Instead, use their name or title.

Refer to your colleagues and contacts using the honorific -san.

Following Dining Etiquette

Japanese dining etiquette is somewhat formalized with rules about using chopsticks, pouring drinks, seating arrangements, and ordering. Here are some key dining etiquette tips:

Wait to start eating or drinking until the elders or honored guests begin.

Pour drinks for others but never pour your own. Likewise, do not pour drinks for superiors.
Use chopsticks properly without gesturing or playing with them.
Eat slowly and compliment the food politely to the host/hostess.

Do not blow your nose at the table. Step away briefly if needed.
Slurping noodles is okay and can signify enjoying the meal.
Never leave chopsticks sticking upright in rice which symbolizes death.

Following dining etiquette helps build trust and illustrates respect for hosts who organized the meal.

Giving Proper Greetings

Greetings in Japan are respectful, formal, and ritualized. Many phrases express gratitude and highlight status. Here are some essential Japanese greetings to know:

Ohayou gozaimasu – Good morning

Konnichiwa – Hello/Good afternoon
Konbanwa – Good evening
Oyasuminasai – Good night

Sayonara – Formal goodbye
Arigatou Gozaimasu – Thank you very much
Hajimemashite – Nice to meet you

O genki desu ka? – How are you?

Greetings should be accompanied by proper bowing and spoken politely regardless of familiarity. Avoid casual phrases like “hey” or “hi” unless very close to the person.

Showing Deference to Elders and Superiors

Showing respect to superiors, elders, and authority figures is paramount in Japan. Seniority is highly valued and age commands great deference. Here are some ways to show deference:

Allow superiors to enter/exit rooms and seating areas first.
Do not begin eating until superiors start.
Pour drinks for superiors but do not pour your own drink.

Give up your seat for elders on public transport.
Listen carefully when superiors speak and do not interrupt.
Speak in a polite register to superiors rather than casual language.

Avoid excessively casual body language like putting your feet up.

Keep in mind that deference is shown based on role and age rather than mere social status. Treat all elders and superiors respectfully, regardless of background.

Respecting Personal Space

Standing about an arm’s length away and avoiding overly casual touching are ways to show respect for personal space in Japan. Here are some tips:

Maintain about 3 feet of distance when conversing.
Avoid back slapping, shoulder grasping, hand shaking, or hugging unless very well acquainted.
Handshakes are common in business but wait for the elder/superior to initiate.

Avoid overly strong eye contact which can seem confrontational.
Do not point feet or legs directly at others as it is rude.
Sit about a leg’s width apart from others if possible.

Respecting personal space shows politeness and avoids making others uncomfortable. Allow elders and acquaintances additional space.

Dressing Conservatively

Showing respect in Japan also involves dressing conservatively to avoid offense. Follow these guidelines for proper attire:

Opt for neutral, solid colors and minimal patterns/logos.

Prefer modest, loose clothing that fully covers shoulders and legs.
Wear clothing in good condition – avoid overly distressed/torn items.
Dress professionally/formally for business with suit and tie.

Consider wearing a face mask when sick to protect others.
Remove shoes when entering homes and certain buildings.
Avoid excessively loud or distracting accessories.

Dress codes have become more relaxed in recent decades but it’s still wise to err on the side of conservatism and modesty.

Avoiding Offensive Words and Topics

To avoid accidentally offending others, there are some words and topics best avoided in Japan unless you have a close relationship with the person:

Avoid curse words and topics like sex which are taboo in public.

Do not discuss politics, religion, or philosophical views unless you know the person shares your beliefs.
Refrain from PDA (public displays of affection) like kissing or excessive hand holding.
Do not make fun of or criticize respected public figures and institutions.

Avoid questioning authority figures or arguing with superiors.
Do not discuss someone’s salary or age which are private matters.

Sticking to neutral subjects helps avoid sensitive territory. Change topics respectfully if uncomfortable discussions arise unexpectedly.

Respecting Traditions

Researching and respecting important Japanese traditions shows great respect when visiting Japan. Here are some key traditions to read up on:

Shinto – Ancient animism-based folk religion which reveres spirits called kami.
Buddhism – Major religion founded on teachings of Siddhartha Gautama.

Tea ceremonies – Ritualized preparations and presentations of powdered green tea.
Ikebana – Art of flower arrangement with deep symbolic and spiritual roots.
Sumo – Ancient style of wrestling honored as Japan’s national sport.

Geisha – Highly trained entertainers and artists dating back centuries.
Kimonos – Traditional robes with distinctive prints and cuts.

Observing traditions helps connect with Japan’s rich cultural heritage. Seek opportunities to respectfully experience authentic traditions.

Conclusion

Showing respect in Japan involves mindfulness of customs, etiquette, and culture. From bowing and gift-giving to honorific speech and dress codes, Japan’s complex code of conduct reflects the value placed on respect. Avoiding offense requires research, observation, and understanding. With patience and preparation, you can navigate Japan smoothly and immerse yourself in a profoundly respectful society.