Many women today are waiting longer to have children. In the 1970s, the average age of first time mothers was 21. In 2020, it was 26.3 years old. So is 28 considered too old to have a baby these days? There are a few factors to consider when deciding the best age to start a family.
Fertility Decline Starts in Early 30s
A woman’s fertility gradually declines in her early 30s. According to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG), a healthy 30-year-old woman has a 20% chance of getting pregnant each month. By age 40, the chance drops to only 5% per monthly cycle.
This age-related fertility decline is due to decreasing number and quality of eggs. Women are born with all the eggs they will ever have – about 1 to 2 million. By puberty, that number drops to about 300,000 to 400,000 eggs. With each menstrual cycle, about 1,000 eggs undergo growth and degeneration.
By age 30, there are fewer eggs left. The remaining eggs also have a higher chance of chromosomal abnormalities, which increases the risk of miscarriage and birth defects.
So while a 28 year old woman is still in her peak childbearing years, her fertility will start declining in just a couple years. Getting pregnant usually takes months or longer. So waiting beyond the early 30s means having fewer opportunities to conceive before significant fertility decline sets in.
Risk of Complications Starts to Increase After 35
Another consideration is pregnancy complications. Risks like gestational diabetes, high blood pressure, preeclampsia, miscarriage and stillbirth increase steadily after the mid-30s.
One large study found the following risks by maternal age:
| Maternal Age | Miscarriage Rate | Stillbirth Rate |
|---|---|---|
| 25-34 | 10% | 0.4% |
| 35-39 | 17% | 0.7% |
| Over 40 | 34% | 1.1% |
The risk of genetic disorders like Down syndrome also rises with maternal age:
| Maternal Age | Risk of Down Syndrome |
|---|---|
| 25 | 1 in 1,250 |
| 30 | 1 in 1,000 |
| 35 | 1 in 400 |
| 40 | 1 in 100 |
| 45 | 1 in 30 |
So at age 28, risks are still very low. But after 35, complications increase steadily, which is why many doctors consider 35 an age threshold.
Benefits of Having Babies in Early 30s
There are some advantages to having children in your early 30s versus younger or older:
– **Maturity and life experience** – In your 30s, you are more mature and emotionally ready for parenthood compared to your 20s. You also have more career, travel and life experience under your belt.
– **Financial stability** – Your 30s are often a time of greater financial stability compared to your 20s or even 40s pre-retirement. More resources and income security make it easier to raise kids.
– **Higher education levels** – Over 65% of first time mothers ages 30-34 have some college education or more. Education levels correlate strongly with income levels and good parenting practices.
– **Longer life expectancy** – Average US life expectancy is around 80 years old. By having kids in your 30s rather than 40s, you increase the odds of being around longer as your kids grow up.
– **Energy levels** – You’ll have more stamina in your 30s versus older to handle sleepless nights and running around after toddlers. Recovery from childbirth is also faster the younger you are.
So while fertility is better in the 20s, there are some nice upsides to parenthood in your early 30s. The biological clock doesn’t turn back, but 28 or early 30s is still young enough to have kids safely.
Success Rates with Fertility Treatments
For women over 35 who face difficulties conceiving, there are now many effective fertility treatments like in vitro fertilization (IVF). According to the Society for Assisted Reproductive Technology, IVF success rates are around:
– 41-43% per cycle for women under age 35.
– 31-33% per cycle for ages 35-37.
– 21-29% per cycle for ages 38-40.
– 7-10% per cycle for ages 41-42.
So by late 30s and 40s, more cycles may be needed. But even into the early 40s, healthy women can get pregnant and deliver with fertility assistance. Egg freezing is also an option to preserve fertility in the 20s and 30s for later conception.
The key is being proactive if you foresee issues ahead. Make an appointment with a reproductive endocrinologist sooner than later. They can assess your fertility levels through bloodwork and ultrasounds and come up with a tailored fertility plan.
Guarding Fertility in Your 20s and Early 30s
To have the best chances of conceiving quickly in your early to mid 30s:
– Maintain a normal BMI – being significantly overweight/underweight can disrupt ovulation.
– Exercise regularly – aim for 30 minutes a day of moderate activity.
– Limit alcohol to 1 drink a day – heavy drinking impairs ovulation and sperm count.
– Don’t smoke – smoking hastens ovarian decline and infertility risk.
– Avoid STIs – Chlamydia in particular can damage the fallopian tubes.
– Limit caffeine to under 200mg/day – high caffeine intake hinders fertility.
Following a Mediterranean style diet rich in plant foods, healthy fats and fish may also benefit fertility. Getting any medical issues like endometriosis or PCOS under control early on improves outcomes later.
Talking with Your Partner
When considering the best age and timing to have kids, involve your spouse or partner in discussions early on. Having open conversations about each other’s preferences, any fertility concerns, finances, career impacts and timelines helps ensure you’re on the same page.
Partners may have different perspectives – like one wanting to start trying right away versus delayed parenthood. Discuss your individual thoughts on topics like:
– Ideal number of kids you each envision having
– Target age range you’d like to have your first child
– How long you’re willing to try conceiving before seeking fertility help
– Conditions under which you’d consider fertility treatments like IVF
– Your top priorities and concerns regarding parenthood
– How you plan to manage career and finances with kids
– Preferred pregnancy spacing between siblings
– Backup plan if conception challenges arise
Making big decisions as a team helps avoid misunderstandings down the road. You want confidence you share fundamental parenting goals and values before embarking on the journey together!
Preconception Checkups
Around six months before trying for pregnancy, schedule preconception checkup appointments for yourself and your partner.
Preconception care gives your doctor time to review medications and recommend supplements, tests or lifestyle changes to optimize fertility and health ahead of conception.
Your doctor will likely:
– Confirm you’re up to date on vaccinations, including:
– Flu shot
– Tdap (tetanus, diptheria, pertussis)
– Chickenpox
– MMR (measles, mumps, rubella)
– COVID-19
– Screen for immunity to infections like varicella, hepatitis B and C
– Review prescription and OTC medications
– Check your weight, blood pressure, blood sugar and immunity levels
– Test for STIs like chlamydia, gonorrhea or syphilis
– Discuss genetic carrier screening if indicated
– Recommend a prenatal vitamin with at least 400mg folic acid
– Assess smoking, drugs, alcohol consumption and eating habits
– Evaluate need for vaccinations or medications for your partner
– Provide guidance on tracking ovulation and timing intercourse
Following your doctor’s pre-pregnancy advice helps ensure you are optimally prepared for conception success.
Is 28 Too Old to Have a Baby? The Takeaway
While a woman’s peak fertility years are in her 20s, 28 is still considered young for pregnancy. Your chances of conception each cycle are favorable at this age. Risks of complications are also very low compared to late 30s and 40s.
That said, recognize your fertility gradually declines through your 30s. Take steps to safeguard your reproductive health like maintaining a healthy lifestyle and partnering with your doctor. They can offer age-specific advice tailored to your goals on when to start trying for babies.
Most importantly, remember you don’t need to rush based on age alone. Have kids when the time feels right for you and your spouse emotionally and practically. Stay focused on your fertility health along the way, and trust your healthcare providers to guide you through the process successfully, even if challenges arise.