Skip to Content

What is it called when someone always talks about themselves?

Quick Answer

The term for someone who constantly talks about themselves is a “narcissist”. Narcissists tend to dominate conversations by turning the focus back to themselves and rarely show interest in others. This self-centered behavior typically stems from an excessive need for attention and affirmation.

What are the signs of a narcissist?

Here are some common signs that someone is a narcissist:

  • They constantly talk about themselves and rarely ask questions about others.
  • They exaggerate their own accomplishments and want constant praise and admiration.
  • They act entitled and feel they deserve special treatment.
  • They monopolize conversations and steer topics back to themselves.
  • They have little empathy and don’t recognize other people’s emotions.
  • They crave and demand attention at all times.
  • They overreact to criticism and can’t tolerate not being the center of attention.
  • They take advantage of others to achieve their goals.

Types of narcissism

There are different types of narcissism that may exhibit slightly different behaviors:

Grandiose narcissism

Grandiose narcissists have an inflated sense of self and require constant admiration. They are typically arrogant, entitled, and crave power and prestige. They tend to exploit people for their own gain.

Vulnerable narcissism

Vulnerable narcissists are hypersensitive to criticism but privately feel inferior. They swing between feeling special and fearing rejection. They may appear insecure and yearn for others’ approval.

Malignant narcissism

Malignant narcissists have features of narcissism as well as antisocial traits like deceitfulness and hostility. They lack empathy, exploit others ruthlessly, and may be vindictive if insulted.

Covert narcissism

Covert narcissists are not outwardly grandiose but still have an inflated sense of self underneath. They tend to be defensive, insecure, and hypersensitive to slights. They lack empathy but envy others secretly.

What causes someone to be narcissistic?

There are several possible causes of narcissism, which may include:

  • Genetics – Research suggests narcissism is partly heritable.
  • Neurobiology – The reward pathways of narcissists’ brains are more active when they talk about themselves.
  • Early childhood experiences – Excessive parental praise, neglect, or abuse may contribute to narcissism.
  • Culture – Individualistic cultures that focus on self-promotion and celebrity may foster narcissism.

However, the exact causes are complex and narcissism likely develops from a combination of biological and social factors.

How does narcissism affect relationships?

Narcissism can significantly impact relationships in negative ways:

  • Narcissists lack empathy and are unable to truly care about a partner’s needs or emotions.
  • They feel entitled to constant attention and admiration from relationships.
  • They will exploit and manipulate partners for their own gain.
  • They react poorly to criticism and may lash out at partners who challenge their inflated self-views.
  • They use relationships primarily to boost their self-esteem rather than create intimacy.
  • They will quickly lose interest in partners who no longer provide enough admiration.
  • Their egocentrism and lack of reciprocity eventually erode relationships.

Partners of narcissists often feel belittled, unsupported, and drained from the constant demands for affirmation. They may start to lose self-esteem and feel trapped in the relationship.

Impact on Romantic Relationships

Narcissism can be especially damaging in romantic relationships. While narcissists initially charm prospective partners, once in a committed relationship they become controlling, self-centered, unfaithful, and even abusive. Their sense of entitlement combined with lack of empathy leads them to exploit their romantic partners without remorse.

Impact on Friendships

In friendships, narcissists see their friends existing mainly to serve their own needs. They dominate conversations, seek excessive emotional support, and exhibit little interest in supporting their friends in return. This creates a draining one-sided dynamic that erodes true friendship.

Impact on Family Relationships

Growing up with a narcissistic parent often impairs children’s emotional development. Narcissistic parents lack empathy, manipulate their children, and view them as extensions of themselves rather than distinct individuals. This creates long-lasting trauma and dysfunctional relationship patterns for their children.

How do you deal with a narcissist?

If you suspect someone is a narcissist, here are some tips for dealing with their behavior:

  • Avoid lavishing them with praise and flattery which feeds their ego.
  • Be aware of their manipulation tactics like gaslighting and playing the victim.
  • Set clear boundaries and don’t tolerate disrespect, exploitation or abuse.
  • Keep interactions brief, polite and superficial.
  • Stay calm and collected in the face of their attention-seeking outbursts.
  • Focus conversations on facts rather than emotions.
  • Offer concrete feedback rather than just compliments.
  • Maintain your independence and don’t rely on them for support.
  • Know when to distance yourself from the relationship if needed.

Ultimately, you have control over your own boundaries. Protect your self-esteem and don’t allow their narcissism to diminish your self-worth.

Signs of narcissism in social media use

Social media provides the perfect platform for narcissists to showcase themselves and seek attention and validation. Here are some red flags:

  • Excessive posting of selfies and glamorous photos designed to elicit praise.
  • Bragging about achievements, possessions, social life, popularity.
  • Making everything about themselves – only posting self-focused content.
  • Exaggerating accomplishments, overstating skills and abilities.
  • Using social media solely for attention, not authentic connection.
  • Obsessively curating their image, presenting idealized version of self.
  • Seeking sites like Twitter with large audiences for attention.
  • Craving likes, comments and quantifiable measures of popularity.
  • Lashing out at critics or becoming irrationally upset over trivial critiques.

Narcissistic Behavior on Facebook

On Facebook, narcissists may constantly post selfies, brag about minor achievements, share exaggerated or fake news articles portraying them positively, and try to demonstrate how well-liked they are. They are highly sensitive to their number of friends and fan base.

Narcissistic Behavior on Instagram

Narcissists are drawn to Instagram because of the visual nature and emphasis on glamour. They meticulously curate their profiles for optimal appeal, validation, and envy from others. Images portray them as wealthy, attractive, extravagant, and elite.

Narcissistic Behavior on Twitter

Twitter provides narcissists with a large audience which feeds their need for attention. They broadcast trivial daily activities to exaggerate their importance and crave retweets and follows. They often tweet excessively about their expertise and attack critics.

Are narcissists aware of their behavior?

In most cases, narcissists lack self-awareness and don’t realize how destructive their behavior can be. Their inflated ego, feelings of entitlement, and pronounced lack of empathy make it nearly impossible for them to see themselves accurately. Even when confronted with evidence of their narcissism, they may become defensive and blame others.

However, in rare cases, some narcissists may have brief moments of insight and clarity into their patterns. But their core personality traits typically remain intact. Their toxic behavior stems from profoundly distorted thought processes that are difficult to change without intensive therapy. But not all narcissists seek help because they don’t think anything is wrong.

Can narcissism be treated?

Treating narcissism is challenging because narcissists rarely believe they need help. However, with motivation and commitment, narcissists can make improvements with long-term therapy. Treatment may involve:

  • Building self-awareness of narcissistic traits.
  • Developing empathy and compassion for others.
  • Recognizing distorted thinking and irrational beliefs.
  • Learning to value authentic personal relationships over exploiting people.
  • Finding healthy ways to feel admired without demanding constant external validation.
  • Relinquishing the need to conceal flaws or project a perfect image.
  • Accepting responsibility for behavior rather than blaming others.

With consistent effort, a narcissist can learn to tone down their extreme egocentrism and relate to others and themselves in healthier ways. But progress is usually gradual and ongoing self-work is required.

Famous narcissists in history

Unfortunately, narcissism is not uncommon among famous figures who seek power, attention, and prominence. Here are a few presumed narcissists throughout history:

Name Occupation Narcissistic Traits
Donald Trump Businessman, U.S. President Arrogance, hostility toward critics, constant boasting, exaggerating achievements
Steve Jobs Apple founder Preoccupation with brilliance, lacked empathy, visionary egocentrism
Kim Kardashian Reality TV star Revels in fame, craves constant attention, highly-curated social media image
Kanye West Rapper, producer Grandiose claims, feels uniquely deserving, lashes out at critics

Of course, fame alone does not cause narcissism. But narcissists aggressively seek the limelight to fulfill their cravings for validation and superiority. The constant public praise and attention exacerbates their worst impulses.

Quotes about narcissism

Here are insightful quotes about narcissism:

“The essence of narcissism is the drive to feel special, to stand out from the other human animals.” – Jeffrey Kluger

“The narcissist does not accept the camera’s gaze. He gazes at it.” – Alexander Lowen

“Narcissists are brilliant in conversation; they have an amazing capacity to enthrall others with their storytelling. But they’re completely incapable of listening; they’re too busy relating to themselves instead of relating to you.” – Lenora Thompson

“A narcissist sees the world as his showcase, with a captive audience on call to affirm his greatness.” – Kathy Caprino

“When you’re constantly having to puff up a narcissist’s ego, it essentially leaves no room for your needs.” – Bree Bondi

Conclusion

In summary, narcissism involves an extreme preoccupation with oneself alongside a lack of empathy for others. Narcissists have an inflated sense of self-importance, constantly demand admiration, and use relationships largely for self-enhancement rather than intimacy. Their egocentrism and manipulative behaviors negatively impact those around them. While challenging to treat, increasing self-awareness can help narcissists develop more compassion, authenticity and reciprocity in their relationships. Recognizing the signs of narcissism allows us to set healthy boundaries against their exploitative tendencies.