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When you lie with dogs you wake up with fleas?

The old adage “when you lie with dogs, you wake up with fleas” warns that the company you keep can have a strong influence on your life and reputation. At its core, it cautions that spending time with unsavory people or groups can lead to undesirable consequences.

Origin

This proverb has ancient roots, with early versions appearing in ancient Greek and Latin texts. The popular English version emerged in the mid-20th century.

In Greek mythology, the sage Chilon of Sparta advised, “Do not dwell with the bad, but draw near the good.” The Roman poet Publilius Syrus similarly warned, “He who lies down with dogs gets up with fleas.”

The modern English version first appeared in print in the 1950s. An early example comes from Don Marquis’ “The Almost Perfect State” (1927): “If you lie down with dogs, you will get up with fleas.”

Meaning

The core meaning is that spending time with unethical, untrustworthy, or disreputable people can negatively impact one’s character and reputation.

More specifically, it suggests:

  • Associating with dishonest people increases the likelihood you will become dishonest yourself.
  • Unethical company can undermine your principles over time.
  • Others may judge you by the company you keep.
  • Bad influences can rub off on you and damage your reputation.

At its heart is the belief that human behavior is profoundly influenced by social environments and peer pressure. Being part of a dishonest or unscrupulous group normalizes such behavior and makes it more likely one will fall into it.

Examples

Here are some examples of how this proverb is commonly applied:

  • Business: An accountant who gets involved in a client’s shady tax evasion scheme may end up facing fraud charges.
  • Relationships: Someone who enters a romance with a known cheater and liar shouldn’t be surprised if they end up being cheated on and lied to.
  • Politics: A politician who rubs shoulders with extremist groups may have their reputation tarnished, even if they don’t fully embrace those groups’ ideologies.
  • Youth: Teenagers who get involved with a bad crowd often struggle in school or have run-ins with the law.

In each case, close association with unethical or dishonest people increases the likelihood that one will engage in such behavior themselves. Their poor values and conduct rub off through peer pressure and normalized wrongdoing.

Analysis

There is strong psychological evidence to support the validity of this adage in many contexts.

Studies show peer pressure and social norms exert enormous influence on human behavior. People are highly prone to conform to the attitudes and behaviors modeled by groups they identify with or want to belong to.

For example, the famous Asch conformity experiments found people went along with clearly incorrect judgments made by groups nearly 40% of the time.

Factors that increase susceptibility

Certain factors make people more susceptible to negative peer influence:

  • Desire for social acceptance
  • Low self-confidence/self-esteem
  • Unsure morals/lack of conviction
  • Immature decision-making skills

Youths exhibit many of these traits, explaining why the proverb is so often applied to the company teenagers keep. Their strong need for social approval, coupled with underdeveloped judgment, makes them highly prone to peer pressure.

The power of social norms

Study after study affirms the immense power social groups wield in shaping norms and conduct, for better or worse. When dishonesty becomes normalized within a group, even good people can fall prey to corrupting influences through incremental pressure and rationalization.

Bad actors also deliberately use peer pressure tactics to influence the vulnerable. Cult leaders leverage social approval and belonging needs to exact harm and control followers.

Echo chambers

Modern social media echo chambers escalate these risks. When people self-segregate into extremist social media groups that normalize fringe views, they can quickly spiral into radicalization and conduct once considered unacceptable.

Criticism

Despite its general validity, the proverb merits some critique and caveats:

  • It overly simplifies complex social dynamics.
  • There are many counterexamples of upstanding people retaining principles despite poor company.
  • Positively influencing others is also possible.
  • It discounts individual agency and responsibility.

Firstly, human behavior is complex, and no single maxim fully captures it. While peer pressure is real, some upright people do maintain integrity even within corrupt environments.

Secondly, it’s possible to positively impact one’s social circle rather than be led astray by it. Reformers often courageously challenge norms within delinquent groups.

Finally, the saying erodes personal accountability. Though external factors influence behavior, individuals ultimately choose whether to follow or flout social norms and rules.

Table: Criticisms and responses

Criticism Response
Overly simplistic True, but still captures a strong tendency regarding peer pressure.
Ignores exceptions Granted, some people resist bad influences, but tendencies remain.
Discounts reformers Positive change is possible, but challenging within corrupt environments.
Diminishes accountability External factors exist, but individuals do choose right or wrong.

Alternate Version and Origin

An alternate version of the proverb uses “down” instead of “lie”:

When you go down with dogs, you get up with fleas.

This version emphasizes deliberately associating or spending time with untrustworthy groups rather than accidentally becoming entangled with them.

The earliest record of this proverb traces back to a Latin poem titled Distichs of Cato, collected during the Roman empire. It stated:

Qui cum canibus concumbunt cum pulicibus surgeon – He who lies down with dogs gets up with fleas.

The maxim endured for centuries largely due to the popularity and influence of the Distichs of Cato as a learning text in medieval Europe.

Usage in Popular Culture

This adage appears in diverse forms of modern media and pop culture:

  • Films like The Godfather (“Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.”)
  • Songs like Harry Styles’ “Wolves” (“When you lie with the wolves, you learn to howl.”)
  • TV shows like The Sopranos (“You lay down with dogs, you get up with fleas.”)
  • Books like Suzanne Collins’ The Hunger Games (“Lie down with dogs and you end up with fleas.”)

This reveals its lasting resonance with audiences, offering dramatic caution about the costs of compromising one’s integrity.

Conclusion

While an ancient observance, “when you lie with dogs, you get up with fleas” remains relevant today. At its core rests an important truth – the company we keep and environments we inhabit shape our behaviors, for better and often worse.

However, its credibility is tied to recognizing human complexity. Not everyone surrounded by bad actors becomes one, just as redemption remains possible. Still, questionable company increases the risks of contamination, a warning that history’s sages understood well.