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Who decides the wedding date?

Choosing a wedding date is an important decision for engaged couples. With so many factors to consider, it can be challenging to settle on the perfect day. This article will examine some key questions couples should ask when selecting their wedding date.

What season do you want to get married in?

The season in which you get married will impact many aspects of your wedding, including venue availability, weather, attire, and decor. Here are some considerations for each season:

  • Spring – Mild weather, blooming flowers and gardens, increased venue availability. Rain is a possibility.
  • Summer – Warm weather, outdoor ceremonies, vibrant colors, busier venue schedules. Heat can be an issue.
  • Fall – Cooler weather, beautiful foliage, harvest themes. Book early as this is a popular season.
  • Winter – Holiday themes, cozy ambiance, reduced rates at some venues. Inclement weather likely.

Think about your ideal vision and determine what season would best bring that to life. Many couples choose spring or fall to take advantage of comfortable weather.

What is your budget?

Your wedding budget will impact your date options. Lavish Saturday evenings in peak season are generally the most expensive. You can save significantly by choosing an off-season or weekday wedding. Here are average costs for different days:

Day of Week Average Cost
Saturday $10,000+
Sunday $8,000 – $10,000
Friday $5,000 – $8,000
Thursday $3,000 – $5,000
Weekday $2,000 – $3,000

Having a clear budget will help steer you toward affordable date options.

What venues are you considering?

Your venue choice will impact what dates are feasible. Historic venues, hotels, and country clubs often have limited availability. Check calendars early and be flexible if you have your heart set on a particular place. Weekends book up quickly, especially in peak seasons.

Weekday, off-season, and daytime slots tend to have more flexibility. Create a prioritized list of potential venues and inquire about open dates.

Do you have your heart set on a particular date?

Some couples feel attached to a specific date, like an anniversary or birthday. This limits your options but can add special meaning to your wedding. If your date is inflexible, make venue inquiries early and be prepared to save up if it falls on a peak day or season.

Having some date flexibility will open up more venue and budget choices. Make a list of 3-5 date options in case your ideal date doesn’t pan out.

Will travel be required for guests?

If most guests are local, date flexibility is easier. If many out-of-town guests are attending, be mindful of dates that require significant travel like holidays.

Here are the best and worst times for guest travel:

Best Travel Times Worst Travel Times
March to May, September to November Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year’s Eve
Any weekend outside of holiday periods 3-day holiday weekends

Avoid guest travel hassles by steering clear of holidays, school breaks, and high vacation seasons if possible.

Are any VIPs unavailable on certain dates?

Before finalizing your date, check with VIP guests like wedding party members, special relatives, and very close friends. Knowing any major pre-existing commitments they have will prevent coordination conflicts down the road.

Some things to consider:

  • Destination weddings – Require more advance notice to allow travel planning
  • Weddings overseas – Consider time zone differences and jet lag recovery time
  • Weddings with many out-of-town guests – Save big by avoiding holiday weekends

Be accommodating to guests who would need to take time off work or rearrange big commitments in order to attend.

How much time do you need to plan?

The length of your engagement will determine the earliest feasible date. Planning a wedding takes an average of 12-18 months.

Here is a typical wedding planning timeline:

Months Before Wedding Planning Tasks
12-18 months Announce engagement, book venue, hire vendors
9-11 months Select bridal party, shop for dress, send save the dates
6-8 months Order invitations, plan honeymoon, book transportation
2-3 months Finalize details, track RSVPs, create seating chart
1 month Confirm final headcount, pick up dress, pack for honeymoon

Leave enough time to check venues, arrange vendors, purchase a dress, and handle all the details. Rushing to plan a wedding in under 6 months can be extremely stressful.

Are any important dates significant to you?

Some couples like to tie the wedding date to something personally meaningful. This could include:

  • Anniversary of when you met or got engaged
  • Special birthday (yours or a loved one)
  • Holiday or occasion of importance, like Independence Day or New Year’s Eve
  • Lucky or favorite number date, like 10-10-20

Incorporating personal significance through the date adds sentimental value. Just make sure to avoid choosing an already crowded holiday weekend.

What dates are already booked or unavailable?

Before finalizing a date, cross-reference your desired venues, vendors, and wedding party to make sure nothing conflicts. Here are some things that could make a date unavailable:

  • Venue is already booked for a different event
  • Caterer, photographer, or other important vendor is not available
  • Bridal party member or VIP guest has an unavoidable conflict
  • Significant religious holiday or occasion for you, your family, or culture

Carefully vet date options to ensure all key wedding elements and people are ready and available. This will avoid unnecessary frustration and last minute changes.

How can we accommodate family events and school schedules?

When setting your wedding date, be considerate of impact on immediate family events like vacations, school breaks, graduations, and birthdays. For families with school-aged kids, schedule around:

  • Spring break
  • Summer vacation
  • Major holidays like Thanksgiving, winter and spring break

Checking the school calendar will allow families to fully participate without interruption. The same courtesy should be extended to other relatives, bridal party, and guests.

What dates are luckiest or most auspicious?

Some couples like to consult astrological signs, numerology, and other traditional systems to determine the luckiest wedding date. In Chinese culture, for example, certain days are believed to be more fortunate based on astrological alignments and number combinations.

Here are some of the luckiest wedding dates per different traditions:

Culture/Tradition Luckiest Wedding Dates
Chinese Dragon and Phoenix months, dates with double numbers like 11-11
Hindu Any date that does not clash with inauspicious astrological positions
Celtic Wedding dates based on moon phases and seasons
Numerology Dates that reduce to lucky numbers like 3, 7, 11

If certain lucky dates resonate for you, factor that into your date selection process.

What dates conflict with religious holidays or events?

Be thoughtful about major religious holidays or fasting periods that could affect your wedding date. Here are some significant religious dates to avoid conflicts with guests:

  • Christian – Christmas, Easter, Lent, Advent
  • Jewish – Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, Passover
  • Muslim – Ramadan, Eid al-Fitr, Eid al-Adha
  • Hindu – Diwali, Navratri
  • Buddhist – Vesak

Be sensitive to the religious diversity of your guest list. Checking an interfaith calendar can help you select an inclusive date.

Conclusion

Setting your wedding date requires balancing many factors – season, budget, venue, travel, schedules, and personal preferences all come into play. Narrow down optimal timing first based on seasonality, guest travel, and school schedules if applicable.

Then investigate venue and vendor availability for your timeframe. Check with VIPs about pre-existing commitments. Finally, choose from remaining options based on budget, significance, and luck.

Collaborating with your partner to thoughtfully select your wedding date will start you off on the right foot for planning a memorable and meaningful event.