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Why do people shut their curtains when someone dies?


People shut their curtains when someone dies for a variety of reasons. This practice dates back centuries and is prevalent across many cultures. Though the specifics vary between regions, religions, and individuals, the motivations behind this tradition boil down to a few key factors: mourning, privacy, respect, and superstition.

In the opening days and weeks after a death, families are often overwhelmed by grief. Drawing the curtains or blinds creates a quiet, dark space removed from the outside world. This supports the mourning process by limiting external stimuli as people process their emotions. The home becomes a cocoon for the bereaved during this difficult transition.

Shutting curtains also signals a desire for privacy in a time of vulnerability. When police, coroners, or funeral directors come to collect the deceased, families appreciate the discretion offered by covered windows. It helps maintain dignity and prevents passersby from intruding on their pain. Similarly, drawn curtains discourage well-meaning friends and neighbors from disturbing the mourners unless explicitly invited.

Beyond supporting the grieving, shutting curtains demonstrates respect for the deceased. Just as closing the eyes pays homage to the dead, closing the curtains offers them honor and tribute. This act remembers the loss while providing comfort to surviving loved ones. It is often done in conjunction with memorial rituals like candle-lighting, praying, or displaying photos of the departed.

Finally, myths and superstitions around death also encourage this practice. In many cultures, open curtains are thought to invite spirits in, while covered windows repel them. Some believe the soul continues to visit for a time, and curtains prevent it from becoming trapped. Or that evil spirits may prey on the dead and curtains thwart their efforts. These traditional beliefs persist today and influence behaviors after a loss.

History and Cultural Origins

The tradition of closing curtains and blinds after a death has spanned centuries and continents. Various cultures incorporated this ritual for similar symbolic reasons. Here are some examples of its origins and historic practice:

Victorian Era: Drawing curtains was central to mourning in 19th century England. Victorians equated the darkness with solemn grief. Elaborate rules dictated window treatments following a loss, depending on one’s relationship to the deceased. More distant acquaintances only shut first-floor curtains, while immediate family covered all windows.

Judaism: Jewish mourning customs include covering all mirrors and drawing blinds. Mirrors are draped to avoid vanity during a time of solemnity. Blinds are kept closed while mourners sit shiva for seven days following a burial. Candles are lit instead of natural light entering.

Ancient Egypt: Egyptians also shrouded mirrors and closed window coverings after a death. They believed the soul continued needing provisions. Drawn curtains prevented it from seeing its relatives going about their normal routines and becoming angry.

China: Traditional Chinese funeral rituals call for all windows to be covered in white cloth. White symbolizes mourning, while covered windows protect the home from evil influences. The cloth remains for 49 days after a passing.

Native Americans: Many tribes tied scraps of cloth to dwelling entrances following a death. This signaled grieving occupants within and created an opaque barrier against spirits. Shuttering windows served the same purpose.

So while specific mourning customs adapted across eras and regions, the impulse to visually close off the home remained constant. It signals loss and respectfully protects the mourners. The symbolism continues to resonate even in modern times.

Psychology of Grief

Psychology provides additional insight into why this tradition resonates. Grieving is an intensely personal process, but common stages and reactions unite the human experience. Drawing curtains taps into these universal responses in several key ways.

1. Shock and denial – Loss initially induces a state of disbelief and numbness. Closing off the home mirrors this desire to block out reality and retreat inward. Darkened windows curtail visual reminders of the death.

2. Pain and guilt – As the loss sinks in, overwhelming anguish follows. Closed curtains provide refuge from a world now perceived as threatening. Shutting out light and activity creates a safe space for working through complex emotions.

3. Anger – Frustration commonly arises towards doctors, fate, or the deceased themselves. Restricting outside interactions prevents mourners from directing anger onto unsuspecting outsiders during this volatile time.

4. Depression – Profound sadness and loneliness often linger for months or years. The dark stillness of shuttered rooms aligns with this bleak mood, acknowledging the void left behind.

5. Acceptance – Finally, mourners adapt to a new reality without their loved one. When ready to reinvest in life, they reopen the curtains, symbolically ready to interact with the world again.

So in mimicking the inward retreat of grieving, this tradition offers comfort across the wide spectrum of emotional responses to loss.

Funeral etiquette

When attending a funeral or visiting a house in mourning, it is polite to adhere to customary etiquette around curtains. As a guest, you should avoid tampering with window treatments set by residents. Follow any visible cues about appropriate light levels.

If curtains are drawn, leave them be. Do not open them without explicit permission from the bereaved. You may offer to crack windows open discreetly for fresh air if weather permits. But maintain the subdued lighting established by the family.

If blinds are open, also avoid closing them, unless specifically asked by the hosts. While you may be accustomed to shutting your own curtains in mourning, respect the wishes of the household you are visiting. They may desire more light or not prescribe to this tradition.

In general, defer to the family’s preferences and engage curtains only to discreetly improve ventilation or temperature, if needed. Refrain from dramatic adjustments to lighting while paying your respects. This allows you to support grieving loved ones appropriately and sensitively.

Funeral home protocol

Funeral directors are well-versed in traditional mourning etiquette around home curtains. They instruct their staff to draw window treatments in preparation for a viewing or wake. This creates an atmosphere of privacy, solemnity, and respect for the deceased and bereaved.

When removing the body from a home, funeral staff are trained to close any open curtains or blinds. They avoid exposing the scene to onlookers, which could disturb mourners. Windows remain shuttered throughout the duration of the services within the home.

Many funeral homes also cover mirrors until after the funeral, based on old superstitions. Their goal is maintaining an environment focused inward on grieving, not outward appearances. Staff return to open curtains and uncover mirrors once their professional duties are complete.

So during this sensitive time, a funeral home’s priority is enabling family mourning traditions. Proper curtain protocol is part of this mission. Well-trained staff handle windows and lighting appropriately as part of comprehensive bereavement care.

Table: Common Funeral Home Window Treatment Practices

When Window Treatment
Removing deceased from home Draw curtains/blinds
During in-home wake/viewing Keep curtains/blinds drawn
Transferring deceased to funeral home Leave drawn treatments as-is
Funeral service concludes Return to open curtains/uncover mirrors

Religious customs

Many faith traditions incorporate shutting curtains or windows into mourning rituals. The symbolism provides comfort during bereavement. Here are some common examples:

Christianity: Early Christians sealed windows with wax following a death. This protected against evil until the soul reached heaven. Covering windows endures in rituals today. Catholics often situate caskets before draped windows.

Hinduism: Hindus withdraw home light sources while mourning. Windows remain shuttered for this darkness. After the cremation, they reopen curtains to symbolize the soul’s release.

Islam: Muslims forbid wailing and public grief displays. Drawn curtains conceal mourning from neighbors. This respects the privacy of grieving families.

Buddhism: White curtains cover Buddhist home windows after a loss. White honors the deceased while blocking outsiders’ gazes during ceremonies.

So regardless of faith, the custom unites religious mourners. It enables spiritual grieving practices compatible with their beliefs on death and the afterlife.

Table: Religious Mourning Window Treatments

Religion Custom
Christianity Draw curtains or cover windows
Hinduism Close windows and curtains
Islam Shut curtains for privacy
Buddhism Display white curtains

Logistical considerations

Beyond symbolism, shuttered windows also serve necessary logistical purposes following a death. This practical function persists today, especially in compact neighborhoods.

Most simply, closed curtains provide privacy. Neighbors, delivery workers, and other visitors cannot inadvertently look into the home during this sensitive time. Grieving families need not worry about being on display in their distress.

In dense areas with little outdoor space, covered windows also minimize disruptions. The bustle of people coming and going to pay respects can overwhelm a household. Drawing curtains muffles this activity, keeping a peaceful atmosphere inside.

Shutting curtains also creates a suitable environment for memorial events. The dim lighting sets an appropriately serious tone and prevents glare on video displays. Quiet and dark rooms aid somber reflection.

On a pragmatic level, window treatments also signal residents are in mourning. Well-meaning knocks from Girl Scouts or campaigners will not intrude if curtains are visibly drawn. This avoids upsetting interruptions.

So while meanings have evolved, functional motivations for shutting curtains endure today. The custom still provides needed respite and discretion.

Selection considerations

When using curtains to establish a mourning atmosphere, certain qualities are preferable. Here are some ideal features:

– Color – Blackout curtains in dark hues like black, navy, gray, or deep purple reinforce a somber mood.

– Opacity – Thick, lined draperies prevent light penetration for dim rooms. Sheers or other gauzy fabrics fail to properly darken space.

– Weight – Sturdy, dense materials like velvet, brocade, faux silk, or layered cotton muffle noise from outdoors.

– Size – Floor-to-ceiling lengths without gaping give a sense of enclosure. Avoid sparse or mismatched window coverage.

– Lining – Lined curtains also help insulation and noise blocking. Unlined fabrics may not adequately seal light or sounds.

Aim for full, enveloping coverage across windows to transform the space. Prioritize function over ornate style or prints. Simple solids in dark shades suit most mourning needs.

Conclusion

Drawing the curtains or blinds after a death is a time-honored tradition. Its prevalence spans cultures, faiths, and centuries. While specifics vary, the ritual taps into universal human emotions surrounding loss. It offers literal and symbolic refuge for the bereaved.

Psychologically, blocking external stimuli aids shock, anguish, and depression. Privacy allows safe emotional processing. Shutting out light provides comfort across all grieving stages. The custom honors the deceased while sheltering their survivors.

Though meanings have expanded over time, core motivations persist. Window treatments regulate light, noise, and visitors during an agonizing rite of passage. When properly practiced, this simple act caretakes mourners through their darkest days.