Skip to Content

Why won’t my newborn settle at night?

What are the common reasons newborns have trouble settling?

It’s very common for newborns to have trouble settling at night. Here are some of the most common reasons:

Hunger

Newborns need to eat frequently, often every 2-3 hours. If your baby is crying at night, hunger is one of the first things to check. Offer your breast or a bottle and see if that helps settle them.

Wet or dirty diaper

Babies cannot settle when they are wet or have a dirty diaper. Check their diaper when they wake at night and change it if needed.

Gas

Gas pain can make it hard for babies to get comfortable and sleep. Try burping baby thoroughly after feeds and using gentle motion like bicycle legs to help them pass gas.

Overstimulation

If baby has had a busy day with lots of activity and people, they may have trouble winding down at night. Try keeping things calm and quiet at night to help them settle.

Developmental leap

Big mental and developmental changes disrupt sleep. Your baby may not settle if they are making a leap.

Undertired

An undertired baby can struggle to sleep. Make sure baby is getting enough daytime sleep. At 6-8 weeks, they need 14-17 hours total in 24 hours.

Overtired

If baby is overtired, they may get a “second wind” and be unable to settle. Watch for tired cues like yawning, rubbing eyes, startled movements.

When should I worry about baby not settling?

Occasional unsettled nights are normal for newborns. However, speak to your doctor if:

– Baby is consistently unsettled at the same time each night

– Unsettled behavior lasts for over 1 hour at a time

– Nothing you try helps baby settle

– Unsettled periods are getting longer and more frequent

– Baby seems distressed or in pain while unsettled

Trust your instincts – you know your baby best. If their sleep behavior seems abnormal for them, seek medical advice.

What are some tips to help baby settle?

Here are some tips that may help your newborn settle at night:

Establish a calming bedtime routine

Do the same sequence of calming activities before bed like swaddle, nurse, read a story, sing a lullaby. This cues baby it’s time to sleep.

Make the sleep space dark, cool and quiet

A room that is too hot, bright or noisy can prevent needed quality sleep. Optimize the sleep environment.

Soothe with sound and motion

Many babies settle when they hear white noise or are rocked, either in your arms or a swing. Experiment to see what motions and sounds help calm your baby.

Swaddle

Swaddling contains startles and simulates the coziness of the womb to help baby sleep better. Use a thin muslin to avoid overheating.

Give a pacifier

Sucking is calming and pacifiers help some babies (over 3-4 weeks old) self-soothe. Offer one gently when putting baby down.

Try baby massage

Gentle touch relaxes muscles and lowers stress hormones. Massage baby before bedtime.

Take shifts with your partner

Split the night so you can each get a solid 3-4 hour stretch of uninterrupted sleep.

What are the risks of sleep training a newborn?

Sleep training techniques like cry it out or pick up/put down are not appropriate for newborns under 4 months. Risks include:

– Physical harm if left to cry unsupervised

– Emotional neglect

– Missing hunger and comfort needs

– Conditioned abandonment (baby stops signaling)

– Elevated cortisol hormones

Instead of sleep training, respond lovingly to your newborn’s night wakings. Meet their feeding and comforting needs. This will foster secure attachment and trust.

When is it safe to start sleep training?

Most experts recommend waiting until at least 4 months to attempt any type of sleep training. At this age babies:

– Can go longer stretches at night without eating

– Have more developed nervous systems

– Have better self-soothing skills

– Have healthy sleep pressure built up

– Respond better to soothing techniques

Look for these signs your baby is ready before starting any formal sleep training method:

Signs of Readiness
Sleeping 5-6 hour stretches
Easily soothed with pacifier, rocking, etc
Can self-soothe to sleep onset
Seems developmentally ready

What methods can I try when sleep training?

Here are some of the most common methods of sleep training a 4+ month old. Talk to your pediatrician before trying:

Graduated Extinction (Cry it Out)

Leave baby alone to self-soothe to sleep. Wait longer intervals before responding. Use for babies over 6 months only.

Fading/Progressive Waiting

Comfort baby, then gradually wait longer between comfort, allowing self-soothing to develop.

Pick Up/Put Down Method

Pick up baby when crying, soothe until quiet but awake, put back down. Repeat with decreasing soothing.

No Cry Methods

Gentler approaches like comforting, verbal reassurance, chair method. May take longer.

How can I make an effective sleep training plan?

Follow these steps to create an effective, gentle sleep training plan for your 4+ month old:

– Consult your pediatrician first

– Decide on your sleep training method based on preferences

– Be consistent with a calming bedtime routine

– Offer a lovey or transitional object at bedtime

– Agree on approach with your partner and divide night shifts

– Teach baby the difference between day and night

– Use the same soothing strategies during the night

– Set a time limit for how long to let baby cry

– Stick with the plan for at least 2 weeks

– Be flexible – adjust the plan if needed

– Avoid sleep crutches like rocking or nursing to sleep

With consistency and time, your sleep training plan will help your baby learn to self-soothe and sleep better at night.

What options do I have if sleep training doesn’t work?

If you have diligently tried sleep training for 2-3 weeks with no improvement, have your pediatrician assess for any underlying issues. Other options include:

– Trying a different sleep training method

– More intensively focusing on daytime sleep hygiene

– Addressing any reflux or allergy issues

– Changing formula or mom’s diet if breastfeeding

– Testing for ear infections or illnesses

– Considering a later bedtime

– Transitioning out of the swaddle

– Shifting daytime feeds closer together

– Using medication or supplements short-term

– Accepting your baby’s temperament and lowering expectations

– As a last resort, bringing baby into your bed per safe co-sleeping guidelines

With time, patience and trial-and-error, you will find the right plan to help your unique baby settle and sleep. Stay consistent and flexible.

Conclusion

It’s very normal for newborns to struggle with settling at night. Reasons range from hunger to developmental leaps. Try to differentiate normal unsettled behavior from more concerning patterns. Employ soothing techniques like swaddling and white noise, but avoid sleep training until baby is 4+ months. When you do sleep train, pick a method and stick to an effective plan consistently. If it doesn’t work after a few weeks, reassess with your pediatrician and try other options to meet your baby’s unique needs. With time and gentleness, your baby will outgrow this phase and learn to become an excellent sleeper.